Take Me Back To The Start
by Not-Gonna-Happen-Duude
Summary: Nobody said it was easy. It's such a shame for us to part. Nobody said it was easy.No one ever said it would be this hard . Oh, take me back to the start. Friendships are never easy. After their downfall Demi and Selena reunite, only for them to become distant once again, making them wish they could go back to the start. Sequel to We Can Fix This
1. Chapter 1

**I've been debating on if I should post this or not for a couple of days, and I decided to go ahead and just do it. I'm already writing the second chapter, but updates are gonna be slow because I start school in 2 days and this year I need to focus on school instead of writing fanfiction in class. I'll try to write when I get the chance. I'm not sure how things are gonna go, but I can guarantee a chapter every month.**

**Um oh thanks to everyone that read We Can Fix This, a lot of people wanted me to continue, and well here it is lol. I know Demi and Selena didn't end up together, but they will, eventually lol. I'm not too sure when. Um, and there will be some Dennel for a couple of chapters, but after that I think I'm gonna focus on Demi and Selena's friendship, since this is after all a Demena story. Just be patient. Please review and let me know what you think, your reviews mean a lot to me. And enjoy(:**

* * *

**Demi's Pov**

_'Dear Demi,_

_I know this is unexpected, and I didn't mean for things to happen this way. I tried calling you, but I forgot you were in a meeting. I had to fly back home to record. I didn't really have a say in it. Call me as soon as you see this. Maybe it's for the best that this happened, so don't feel bad about it. Um I love you._

_- Jennel'_

I ball up the small sheet of paper and throw it across my room, watching as it bounces off my wall and lands on my bed.

I punch my bedroom door, not hard enough to hurt me, or to leave any marks, but hard enough to express my anger.

She's gone; temporarily, but she's gone, and I didn't even get a proper good bye.

_'Maybe it's for the best that this happened.'_

What does she mean by that? Did she want to get away? Did she actually wanna leave? I mean, I guess I'd understand that she would want to leave. But at the same time I can't, I can't understand. I don't even know if I've done something wrong.

We haven't been fighting, we actually never really fight.

I jumped when I felt a pair of arms wrap around me.

"Demi you okay?"

"I-I'm not sure. She left, she's gone. I don't even know how long she'll be gone. She left without saying goodbye. All I got was this letter. I have to call her. Have you seen my phone? Wait no forget it, I'm flying out to Massachusetts."

I walk towards my closet and start throwing clothes on my bed, I need to go now. I've done something wrong to make her think there's a reason we need to be separated, whatever the reason is I have to go fix it.

"Whoa Demi. Calm down. Come here sit."

"I think she might be mad at me." I sit on the floor instead of sitting on the bed.

"Demi, it's okay. You can't just fly out like this. You have responsibilities here that you need to take care of. You'll be seen, and what are you gonna say? Oh I'm here to visit my girlfriend."

He's right, I guess. I mean yeah he has a point. Technically I have no reason to be there.

"Fine. I won't go. At least not now. I guess I should talk to her." He's not even listening.

"Maybe it's for the best that this happened. Did something happen between you guys?" And he's reading the note she left behind. I don't care, I was gonna tell him either way.

"I don't know. I don't think so. She confused me too when I read it."

* * *

"Jennel?"

"Demi! Hey! Baby I'm so sorry. I had to leave, it was completely unexpected. I knew that I'd have to start recording, but I wasn't so sure as to when. I hope you're not mad at me." How can I be mad when I'm talking to an angel?

"No Jennel it's fine. I understand. I leave the house all the time. A-are you busy? There's something I need to talk to you about." Better now than later right?

"Is everything okay?" I can tell by the tone of her voice that she's worried.

"I think the better question is are we okay?"

"Demi, I don't get it. What's up?"

"Maybe it's for the best that this happened? Um I love you?" I read what she wrote in the letter. It's so unlike her, it surprises me that she even wrote something like that.

"O-oh." Oh. Oh? Is that all she can say?

"Seriously Jennel? Oh? Did I do something to upset you?"

"Sorry. It's just you. It's not you; I mean it's you and Wilmer. You guys have been spending more time together; we haven't been on a date in a while. I know you've been busy recording, but I miss you Demi. And you keep canceling on me so you can spend time with him. I'm not mad, just jealous. He's your ex, you get where I'm coming from?"

Fuck. I hadn't really payed much attention to it, I've been selfish.

So I actually was doing something wrong. I've been picking at my brain ever since I read her letter; trying to figure out what it was that made her think we needed time apart.

It doesn't make it any better that I was with Wilmer when I realized she was gone.

"Wow."

"Wow?" She questions me. I'm pretty sure she wasn't expecting me to respond like that.

"Yeah wow. I'm really lucky to have someone like you. I know for a fact if your ex came back into your life I wouldn't let you of my sight. I wouldn't be so cool about this."

"Oh. Okay is that all?"

"Is that all? Jennel, is something else wrong? Just tell me because I feel like you don't wanna talk to me right now."

"I-I Demi I'm sorry. I don't know. I'm not making any sense. We'll talk later."

"No. Jennel?"

She hung up on me. She actually hung up on me. What am I doing wrong?

This isn't fair. I'm alone.

I don't even know what's happening. I don't know if I'm to blame for whatever this is. I mean yeah, I am 'cause I've been ditching her for my ex.

It's not like I did it intentionally. He's just always been my rock. He was there when I needed someone. He was one of the few people trying to save me, but there's only so much you can do for someone. And I needed him. With everything that happened with Selena, I need someone to comfort me.

I didn't wanna bug Nick because I know he's been busy with his brothers making music, and touring. Jennel, she's my girlfriend, and I love her. Sometimes, she acts like a best friend instead, and I appreciate it because she doesn't go all over protective on me. She listens and understands me.

But there's not much to be jealous of though, Wilmer's just a friend. And so is Nick, and she has no problem with Nick, they actually get a long pretty well.

But Nick isn't an ex. And it's not like I'm planning on getting back together with Wilmer, I think.

Uh oh. I didn't just think that.

I can't just get rid of him. Since we met he's become a part of my life. Wilmer I just have some connection, I don't know it's weird to explain. I can't let go of him, not yet anyways.

_'I'm sorry Demi, I'm an idiot. I shouldn't have done that. I'll call you before bed. There won't be any interruptions, and I'll be completely honest with you. I love you princess.'_

I smile at my phone, content with the message she just sent me.

That's just what I needed to calm my nerves. At least she isn't mad at me. It amazes me how she can make me smile with a couple of words.

* * *

**Jennel's Pov**

What am I supposed to do? I'm just so confused and frustrated.

I've just never been in this situation before. But that doesn't give me the right to act this way towards Demi, no matter how jealous I am. And it's not just that I'm jealous, I'm scared. I don't wanna lose her, she means too much to me.

I feel threatened. Wilmer and I have spoken to each other a few times, and honestly he's a really great guy. I can tell he cares about Demi, and his intentions aren't to take her away from me, but he's her ex. They've been together on and off for like two years, there's something about him that's not letting Demi forget about him.

I won't get in the way of it. I know he's always been there for her, and I won't make her forget him. I trust Demi enough to know what's best for our relationship.

She can make her own choices, she's only human and I know she will make mistakes, but in the end it is what it is. I just hope she doesn't plan on breaking up with me. And if she does, I just wanna be completely honest with her and tell her everything I'm thinking right now.

I will fight for her, but I don't plan on competing for her.

She knows me better than anyone else, she assumed that something else is wrong, and she's right. My parents are suspecting of me being in a relationship. I'm eighteen, there's nothing they can do about it, but I don't wanna lie to them either.

Only Demi's family and some of her friends know about us. But I haven't told anyone.

What would I even say to my parents? Would they accept me? Would they be mad? I don't want them to hate me, they're my parents. I love them and I would hate for things to go wrong.

"Alright Jennel. Something's up, you've been a bit off today. We've made progress, so I'll let you go home."

"Thanks Matt. See you tomorrow. " Freedom. I enjoyed recording, but I really just wanna talk to Demi.

* * *

"Jennel?"

"Yeah?"

"I um, it's Selena. H-how are you?"

Selena is calling me. What am I supposed to do?

I mean we're cool and all, but she hurt Demi, again. But that isn't my battle. She's a really nice person, we actually hung out once after that dinner. I got to know her better.

"Hey Sel. What's up?"

"I wanted to talk to you."

"I don't think there's anything we need to talk about."

"Please Jennel? I know it doesn't make sense for me to call you after what happened, but I need you. You're the only one I can talk to. You know Demi just as well as I know her. Please?"

"F-fine. I'm not in LA, I had to fly back home."

"When are you coming back?"

"I'll be back Thursday, so the day after tomorrow. I'll text you so we can meet up or whatever."

"Thank you Jennel, this means a lot to me. You know you're a really nice person. I've enjoyed your company, and thanks for not making things awkward between us." I nod. Wait it's not like she can see me.

"No problem. This is Demi's problem not mine. I'll be by her side, but that doesn't mean I'll treat you differently."

"Thanks. I'll see you soon."

"Yeah. Have a goodnight."

"You too. Can you not tell Demi I called, please? Or that we're gonna meet up?"

"That's up to me if I tell her or not. I'll see you Thursday."

Great just what I needed, as if I don't have enough of my plate as it is. I don't even know what made me give in. I guess cause I feel sorry for her.

I know Selena doesn't hurt Demi intentionally. But maybe she'll tell me what's bugging her. Might as well call Demi.

* * *

"Wilmer stop." Are you serious? _Wilmer stop_, yup that doesn't sound suspicious at all.

"Demi."

"Jennel. I'm sorry. Wilmer was changing the channel. How'd it go in the studio today? Did my rock star have fun?" _My rock star. _It's been a while since she's called me that.

"How? How do you do that? I was feeling bad, I wasn't even gonna call you, and now you have me smiling like an idiot." I can't help but blush as I speak. She totally changed my mood.

"Haha. Because I looove you." She drags out the o love and giggles over the phone.

What if she's just saying it to tease Wilmer, because she no longer says it to him? Great, there goes my good mood and now I'm paranoid.

"Dems, I'm sorry. Can we talk tomorrow? I really just wanna sleep." I purposely yawn trying to make it more believable.

"Oh. Um yeah I guess." I can hear the disappointment in her voice.

"Or I could stay up and talk to you?"

"No, you should get to sleep babe. You're tired from your flight and you have to be in the recording studio. You won't get much done if you're lacking sleep. And you know how you get when you're sleepy."

"You know how you get when you're sleepy." I mimic her.

"That's exactly how you get. You're so childish Jennel. We'll talk tomorrow."

"If you insist."

"Good girl. I hope you sleep well. Oh wait when are you coming back?"

"Umm I'm not sure, I think Friday, I'll let you know."

"Oh okay. I love you, goodnight."

"I love you too, and I'll call you first thing in the morning. Bye."

Now I'm lying to her.

Perfect Jennel, just perfect.

* * *

"Hello?"

"I love you."

"Haha Jennel we just talked not even like a minute ago." I felt guilty; I thought it'd be best to call her. I know I wouldn't have gotten any sleep if I didn't.

"I know Demi, but I just wanted to remind you. I love you. I'm really lucky to call you my girlfriend. You mean the world to me. I love you princess."

"I-I thanks. I love you too. A lot. I'm sorry I'm just speechless right now. I've really missed you. It took me till now to realize that."

"I just wanted to remind you. I'll call you tomorrow. Goodnight beautiful."

"Goodnight baby. Sweet dreams. I love you."


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for the feedback on the first chapter, I enjoyed reading the reviews, they really mean a lot to me. I'll be answering them on here instead of PM. And thanks for reading my one-shots, I'm glad you guys enjoyed it. **

**I know you're waiting for Demena to happen, but it'll be a while. But there is some Demena interaction, which I wrote at like 2 in the morning when I couldn't sleep lol, so it's different.**

**Next chapter will have more drama, and I've already started writing it so it shouldn't be too long till I post it. Enjoy(:**

* * *

**Selena's Pov**

Maybe I should just call her and see what she's up to, there's nothing wrong with that right? I mean it's the right thing to do.

She left my house heart broken that day, and we haven't talked since. It's been like maybe two weeks but it felt like longer, especially since I had already gotten used to having her around.

I know I was stupid, I know that I am stupid, but still. I don't even know what to do anymore. I'm gonna tell her, soon, or eventually, or maybe some day in the not so near future.

**Demi: 'Hey.' **Speak of the devil.

A simple text has my stomach in knots, three letters have made my heart race. I'm definitely falling for her, and I don't know how to feel about that.

**Selena: 'Hey beautiful. How's it going?**' It's a simple casual text along with a compliment.

**Demi: 'You know compliments will get you no where (;'**

**Selena: 'They might get me in your pants (;'** I couldn't help myself, she set herself up for it. My perverted mind saw the chance and took it.

**Demi: 'I always knew you wanted me for sex. Sorry I don't put out without a date :P'**

**Selena: 'We already had a date. You came to my house and spent the night, remember? So I think that means we could have sex :P'**

**Demi: 'You're an idiot! I miss you though Sel. I've been thinking a lot, and it's stupid doing this over text but whatever. I don't wanna be without you, so do you think we can go out today?' **Wow.

I'm happy because I've missed her, and it makes it a lot more easier on me. But it scares me, more like surprises me that she's being this way.

Demi isn't one to hold a grudge, but I know she's stubborn, she doesn't give in easily.

**Selena: 'Yeah sure, just text me.'** Crap, Jennel.

**Selena: 'Um sorry Demi, I have to meet with someone today actually, and I'm not sure at what time. I'll text you to see if I can.'** I quickly text her before she can reply.

Like I just don't even know what to think right now. It's not right, like it's not normal for me to ditch my best friend to meet up with her girlfriend. Well I'm not normal, so I have an excuse.

**Demi: 'Sure, no prob. I'll text you in case you forget. I just kinda wanna talk to you about something, about us. And something else, which I need my best friend for.'**

**Selena: 'So I'm your best friend? Gosh Dems, we go on a date, I lived with you for like a month and we're still best friends? I thought I was past the friend zone ;)'**

**Demi: 'xD You're an idiot Gomez. I'll talk to you later.'**

**Selena: "I may be an idiot, but you love me either way.'**

**Demi: 'Unfortunately. Haha just kidding. Text ya later.'**

I'm fucked. I'm just feeling so many things right now, my mind is racing like crazy. I wanna run to Demi right now, I'm desperate to see her, but I can't.

I'm nervous about seeing her, but I'm also excited. I'm just curious as to what it is that we need to talk about.

She's obviously forgiven me because she was so blunt about everything. She flat out told me that she wants to see me instead of beading around the bush.

* * *

**Demi's Pov**

I don't even have a reasonable answer as to why I shouldn't text her. I mean yeah she's keeping something from me, but she's my best friend, and I miss her.

The fact that I miss her makes it easier to text her. I don't wanna lose her again. I'm just gonna pretend like nothing ever happened, I think I'm living in the past. I keep expecting everything to be how it was before, but it won't happen, we aren't even the same people anymore. But of us have changed and matured these past couple of years.

**Demi: 'Hey.'** It's better if I text her now because I know I'll probably back out of it.

**Selena: 'Hey beautiful. How's it going?'**

**Demi: 'You know compliments will get you no where (;'**

**Selena: 'They might get me in your pants (;'** I can't believe she just said that! I'm blushing like crazy right now, I don't get why though. Might as well just go along with it.

Would she even want to have sex with me? I doubt it, she's my friend, and she's straight. She's probably never thought about me in a sexual or relationship way. Would she be good in bed? I mean she's hot, and I did have a crush on her when we were younger, and there is no way those thoughts just crossed my mind.

She's my best friend, and I'm happy with Jennel, I shouldn't be thinking about Selena like that, no matter how hot I think she is.

**Demi: 'I always knew you wanted me for sex. Sorry I don't put out without a date :P'**

**Selena: 'We already had a date. You came to my house and spent the night, remember? So I think that means we could have sex :P'**

My best friend is an idiot.

**Demi: 'You're an idiot! I miss you though Sel. I've been thinking a lot, and it's stupid doing this over text but whatever. I don't wanna be without you, so do you think we can go out today?' I didn't wanna do it over text, but I think it's for the better.**

I wanna be mad at her but I can't be. I'm still trying to get over it, and I know hearing her voice right now would make it a lot easier. Her voice would make me cave in and forget everything.

It's not that I wanna purposely hold a grudge against her, but I kinda still wanna keep it in mind. I'm not too sure why though.

**Selena: 'I may be an idiot, but you love me either way.'**

**Demi: 'Unfortunately. Haha just kidding. Text ya later.'**

* * *

**Jennel's Pov**

"Okay, why don't you come out?" I nod and take off the headphones, placing them on the stand.

Matt motions for me to take a seat next to him.

"You sound fantastic. You're voice is so unique. We've made a lot of progress and I think you should do a cover and release it as a single. You've already covered three songs, so I don't know if you wanna pick from those three." I smile and nod. I'm so happy I've come this far.

"Um actually I have a song in mind. I haven't recorded it yet. You think we can record it before I leave? Or at least some of it. I was thinking Paris."

"Totally. Whenever you're ready." I give him a thumbs up and walk back into the recording room.

"You got me down on the floor  
So what'd you bring me down here for?  
You got me down on the floor  
So what'd you bring me down here for?"

It comes out so naturally. I haven't sung this since my audition. It brings back so many memories.

* * *

_"You're gonna be fine Jennel. I believe in you."_

_"Jess I don't think I can do it."_

_"Yes you can. You're you. You're full of confidence, you're gonna own that stage. Just pretend like you're in your room." I walk away from my family and stand by the stage._

_"Alright. Jennel Garcia, you're up." I smile at the staff member and walk onto the stage._

_I could feel everyone's eyes on me, watching my every move. I just hope I don't trip, I'm already nervous enough as it is, the last thing I wanna do is embarrass myself._

_I take a deep breath and stop in front of the judges, there's no turning back now._

_"Hi." I look at Demi and smile._

_"Hi!" I replied, a bit too strong. I'm extremely nervous, and the fact that Demi's the one talking to me doesn't make it any better. She looks gorgeous._

_"How are you?"_

_"I'm good, how are you?"_

_"Great, thank you. What's your name?"_

_"My name is Jennel Garcia." I regain my confidence. I'm no longer shy._

_"Nice to meet you."_

_"Nice to meet you too."_

_"How old are you?"_

_"I am 18 years old."_

_"So who are your inspirations?"_

_"I'm into like a lot of old rock, Pat Benatar." I was proud of my response. I mean everyone is trying to listen to what's on the radio; I'm into rock, and I'm a total sucker for old rock._

_I noticed that she was about to speak up again, but Simon cut in. I kinda wish he didn't; the way Demi was talking to made me feel more confident. Her voice was so smooth and gentle. She made it seem that she was actually interested in me._

_Alright just remember what Jess said, pretend that you're in your room._

_"You know what I find is really really interesting? Is that you have such a cute face, you're really likable. And then all of a sudden you're like I'm on fire. Like I literally wrote down in my notes hot. Okay you're awesome." I had pretty much tuned out the other judges. Demi's opinion was probably the most important to me. It could be 'cause I may have a small crush on her._

_"Thank you." I smiled at her._

* * *

"If I was from Paris  
I would say  
Ooh la la la la la la la"

I open my eyes and look up at Matt. I was lost in my own little world during this song; more like taking a trip down memory lane.

I never would have thought that going on X Factor would have changed my life so much. It wasn't just music that made an impact, it's the fact that I began dating Demi. Who would have thought I'd have a relationship with my mentor?

Besides that, I didn't expect things to start going downhill between us. I plan on fixing things when I get back later on today.

It makes me feel like shit that she's probably with Wilmer right now. But I can't be mad at her, as much as I want to be I can't. I can't be mad at either of them.

I get that she's lonely, but I'd rather her be with Nick instead of her ex. I don't think I could live knowing that she cheated on me or something. I'm not saying she is, or that she will, but you never know. It breaks my heart just thinking about it.

I've been nothing but nice to her. I give her space when she needs it, I've never been clingy, I try my best to understand her, I've given her all my love. And maybe it just isn't enough for her.

I hadn't realized tears were making their way down my cheek. I look up and see that Matt is about to come in, but my phone starts ringing.

He comes in, but I hold my hand up signaling for him to wait.

"S-selena?" My voice ended up cracking. I hope she didn't catch it.

"I was calling to know what time your flight is, but that doesn't really matter right now. Is everything okay?" Yeah, she definitely heard my voice crack.

"Yeah, I'm fine. My flight, um. My flight! Oh my gosh I need to be at the airport in an hour. I'll call you when I get there. Sorry, thanks bye."

"My flight!"

"Jennel, calm down. The airport is about twenty minutes away from here. And there isn't much traffic at this time so you can get there in ten, maybe fifteen minutes."

I let out a long breath. Thank God, the last thing I needed was to miss my flight.

My flight leaves at 11:55, and it's 10:30. I think I'm good on time.

"You think I can record one more song? I just really need to get it out. I don't care if we record just the chorus, but I need to get it out. Please?"

* * *

**Veronika: Thanks, I'm glad you're enjoying it(:  
**

**Demenaforever13:**** Don't worry, I don't really like the Dennel stuff happening, but it'll end sooner than you think(;**

**LovezObsessed: ****Selena and Jennel's conversation is very interesting let's just leave it at that. Nothing more than a friendship with Demi and Wilmer? HA! **

**DepressedMessOfAGinger:**** Haha yes a sequel! I don't think I could have left it hanging like that.**

**Suefanficlover:****I'm desperate for Selena and Demi to work things out too. But it'll be a while, I think?**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for all the reviews guys, they really mean a lot. This chapter is a lot more focused on Jennel and Selena, so is the next chapter. I think that by the next chapter Demi will be more involved, idk yet. Just know there is a lot of drama.**

**I'm thinking of writing a new story, not sure where I wanna go with it yet. **

**Suefanficlover: Here's the next chapter, I hope you enjoy it(:**

**Demenaforever13: I don't hate Wilmer, I just like him and Demi together. Selena and Demi were made for each other.**

**LovezObsessed: Lol you're right, there's already too much conflict, but I just added more.**

**Manhattanpizza: Of course Demi and Selena will be together in the end!**

**Aperson3: Thanks for going back and reading it. Hope you like this chapter.**

* * *

**Jennel's Pov**

"Hey, how'd it go?" I don't know why I did it, but I just needed someone to comfort me. So I hugged her, tight. She wasn't Demi, but I won't see her till later on, and I needed this now.

I felt her wrap her arms around me. She rubbed my back and pulled me into her even more.

"You're gonna be okay."

* * *

I wasn't sure where she was taking me, but I didn't really mind. It was actually relaxing. We sat in silence, but it wasn't awkward. I could tell she had a lot on her mind. And that worries me.

I don't get what she has to say to me. I can't get it through my head why my girlfriend's best friend,who she has stopped talking to, wants to talk to me.

"Where are we going?" I finally break the silence.

"A coffee shop. I mean if that's okay?"

"Yeah it's fine. Thanks for, this."

"You don't need to thank me. I should be thanking you for giving me the opportunity to be able to talk to you."

* * *

"I'm in heaven. This doughnut is perfection." I take another bite and let my taste buds experience the chocolaty goodness once more.

"Wight? Twis ish dwefintly the best donwuts I've ever had." I don't say anything, I just stare at her, and she looks back at me. We both break out into a fit of laughter, causing some old lady to hush us.

She swallows the mouthful of doughnut she had and we continue laughing a bit more. Now that that's out of the way, I hope we can get down to business.

"Demi told you everything right?" It's like she read my mind just now, maybe she just wants to get it over with.

"I hope she did. You're scared of telling her something? "

"Does it really seem that simple?" She asks me, and I don't know how to respond.

"I don't know. That's how it seems, but obviously to you it isn't that simple because you haven't been able to tell Demi. I think you should though, because no relationship should have secrets."

"I wanna tell her. I've wanted to tell her for years, but I just can't. It would change our friendship. I don't wanna lose her."

"But you're gonna lose her if you keep things from her." I think I might have struck a chord with that; she's tearing up.

"I'm sorry Selena, did I say something?"

"N-no. Just, Demi." She couldn't speak properly.

"You're gonna be okay." I repeat the words she had said to me earlier, hoping they would have the same affect on her.

Fortunately they did because she smiled at me. I watched her as she took a deep breath before speaking up again.

"She said that to me. That I'm gonna lose her if I keep things from her. I just don't know anymore. I want to tell her, but I could lose her if do. Either way I'll lose her in the end."

"And what if she doesn't leave you? What if she doesn't change? Demi's been through so much, she's in no position to judge, and you know that she wouldn't."

"I know, and I kinda need your help."

"My help?"

"Yeah. I don't wanna lose Demi, and I thought you could help me. I don't know if you could maybe convince her or something?"

"Why should I? I can't force Demi to be friends with you."

"I'm not saying that, like just make her be not so hard towards me. She texted me earlier today, she was in a good mood. We were joking around like nothing happened, but I know she won't let it go that easily."

I guess I get what she's saying, and I'll help her, but only because I want Demi to be happy.

"Okay. I'll see what I can do." She smiles at me, but blushes once her phone goes off.

I look at her, and smile. I automatically think of the time Spongebob found out Squidward likes Krabby Patties. She looks back at me and smiles. She's just, she's something else.

"Is it bad that I wanna laugh right now?" She shakes her head at my question and starts giggling.

"You know, that's her ringtone whenever you text or call her. You guys are so cliche."

"Are you serious? I didn't think she would have that as her ringtone." Her phone goes off again, playing One And The Same once more. They are so meant to be friends.

* * *

"So am I taking you to Demi's?" Things had been quiet between us after we walked out of the coffee shop. It wasn't awkward, we had been talking a lot actually, but as soon as we left the shop, the talking stopped.

I could tell she was thinking about something, it's like she wasn't even there, she was basically lost on her own little world.

"Yeah, please?"

"No prob. I hope this won't be the last time we go out."

"Of course not." I smile at her, and she smiles back.

Again, we fall into another silence.

I wanna talk to her, I have so many things I wanna ask her, I have so many questions that I'm pretty sure she has the answer to.

I know something's bothering her, she's kinda easy to read. Her walls aren't put up all the way. But what would I even say? I don't want her to close me out like she's done to Demi, I wanna actually get somewhere with our conversation.

"Selena, I, well. Um." She turns to face me, but makes sure to pay attention to the road.

"What's wrong?" I blurt out, causing her to sigh.

"Just a lot on my mind."

"No shit. Seriously Selena, what's wrong? It's not good to keep everything in. I know you wanna talk about it."

"I can't."

"You can't or you won't? Look I have nothing against you, I respect you and whatever you say stays between us. Demi doesn't even know I'm with you, hell she doesn't even know I'm back in LA. I lied and told her I'd be back tomorrow."

"I like Demi, and I think I always have. There you happy!" She screamed and slammed the steering wheel, making the horn go off.

"What?"

"I like Demi okay? You have nothing to worry about because I wouldn't dream of getting in the way of your relationship. That's why I left Demi. That's always been the reason for our fall outs, because I like her more than a friend!" Her screams turned to sobs.

We had just arrived at Demi's apartment. I decided to stay quiet until she parked.

She didn't face me, her face was in her hands as she sobbed. I took of my seat beat and hugged her tight. I was surprised when I felt her hands wrap around me. She rested her head on my shoulder and continued to cry.

"It's okay Sel, just let it out." She took a deep breath and pulled away.

"I'm sorry." Her voice was still a bit shaky , but she was finally able to speak up.

"There's nothing to be sorry for."

"Yes there is. I've hurt Demi because of this. I fell for my best friend Jennel! Do you not understand that?! And I just told you, of all people I told you! You're Demi's girlfriend for crying out loud,I'm stupid! You probably hate me! I'm sorry." Tears were quickly racing down her face, she was struggling to breath properly.

I didn't know how to respond, so I just hugged her again. I knew if I spoke up she would say the opposite, and I really don't wanna argue, I know she's stubborn.

"You should be mad at me."

"I'm not mad. I kinda always knew. I had my suspicions, but you just confirmed it, and I'm okay with it. You can't help who you fall for right? As cliche as it sounds it's true."

"Y-you knew?" She pulled away once again. My hands immediately went up to her face as I brushed away the tears.

"Yeah. It just all adds up. You were jealous of Demi spending time with her coworkers, and you kinda overreacted when you um saw us on the beach.

I've noticed the way you look at her, your eyes automatically light up. Whenever her name came up in our conversation just now, I would catch you smiling. You're not very subtle." She seemed calm, she was most likely processing everything.

"We're cool though right?"

"Yeah. There's no reason for us not to be. I know you wouldn't get in the way of my relationship with Demi, and I"m not gonna treat you any differently. Surprisingly,I'm not even jealous of you spending time with her. You're not a problem, but-"

"Wilmer might be?" She cut me off and finished my sentence for me.

"How did you know?"

"He makes Demi happy, and she'd leave me for him sometimes. I understood though because they were in a relationship, but when you left the first time I came over and saw them together. And then he went to the set of X Factor and they took pictures together."

I remember getting the notification when she posted those pictures. I tried to not let it get to me, but in the end it did. I always feel so insecure when it comes to Demi, I'm scared of losing her.

"But whatever she loves you, she always talks about you. I've never heard anything bad about about you. And even when she complains about you, which is hardly ever, she says it's cute. The girl is head over heels in love with you Jennel."

I couldn't help but smile, but also I couldn't help but notice the change in Selena's face as she spoke. I know she means well and everything, but I can tell it hurts her to think about Demi being in a relationship.

"I'm gonna go. Thanks for, well everything."

"We're okay though right?"

"Yup. I'll treat this as if it never happened, if that's okay with you?"

"That's more than okay. Thanks Jennel, for being here for me. It really means a lot to me." I pecked her cheek and opened the door. I threw my bag over my shoulder and waved.

She waved back, but she didn't leave, not till I reached the door. Time to go see my princess.

* * *

"Demi?" I ended up whispering her name. I was hoping to surprise her but she beat me to it.

I slammed the door and ran back out. I heard her yelling, but I kept running. She hadn't even seen me, she was probably just scared cause someone had opened the door to her house.

My lungs were quick to give out. I threw myself on the ground, I could barely breathe, I was crying too hard to control my breathing.

I didn't care that it was dark, or that the rain was soaking my clothes, that was the least of my problems. Where am I staying?

"S-selena." I couldn't speak. My breathing was still uneven, I couldn't stop sobbing. My body was shaking terribly, my throat was tight.

"Jennel? Jennel is everything okay? Are you okay?"

"Come. Please, come pick me up." I hung up and let my phone hit the wet road.

She was the only person I could think of calling. I'm not ready to see Demi yet, and I don't no anyone else here.

I opened my eyes when I felt a light hit my face. A loud bang brought me back to the real world.

"Jennel what the fuck happened!" She pulled me into her, I didn't respond, I didn't even flinch, I just let her hold me.

"Jennel, what happened?" I could hear the worry in her voice.

I knew she was trying to stay calm, but she was having a hard time doing it. She was growing impatient, I didn't want to worry her. The last thing I need is for someone to care about me, Demi obviously doesn't, so why would anyone else?

"Can you just take me somewhere else?"

"Yeah, come one I'll take you back to my place."

* * *

"Jennel? Jenn wake up?"

I feel my arm being shoved. I shift my body and face the window.

"Jenneeeel." She drags out my name and slaps my arm, this time I turn and face her.

"We're here come on." I had forgotten everything in that moment.

I get why people like to sleep so much. It's the only moment when you don't feel any pain, nothing can get to you. It's like your dead for that little while.

I follow after her and just stand at her door, unsure of what to do.

My clothes are still soaked, I wouldn't wanna get anything wet, even though the seat of car is most likely wet as it is.

"Follow me." I walk behind her and follow her up the stairs.

I take a look around and let everything sink in. Her house has that homey feel to it.

"I'm not sure if we're the same size, but it'll do for now. You can pick out what you want. Just bring your clothes downstairs so I can put them in the dryer. And I'll take your bag downstairs so I can go ahead and start drying these clothes. I'll be downstairs if you need anything, we need to talk."

"Y-yeah. Sorry, for this."

"Shh no, don't apologize. We'll talk when you get downstairs."

* * *

"You hungry?" I shake my head and pull the stool closer to the counter.

"Fine, looks like you'll miss out on my famous cookies." She walks over with a plate of cookies in her hand.

I know she's trying to cheer me up, and it's working, a little.

"Take your time." She smiled at me, I just nodded.

I decided to go ahead in tell her, there's no use in keeping it in. There's no one I could talk to this about anyways, no one knows abut my relationship.

"Well Demi didn't know I was flying in today, I told her I'd be here tomorrow since you were picking me up.

I knew she had been spending time with Wilmer, and I called her out on it. I told her that we weren't spending too much time together anymore. I know she's busy recording, but she started spending her free time with him.

We haven't even been on a proper date in a while. Whenever I want to ask her out to dinner she already has plans with him. I'm okay with it, to an extent.

I'm happy that he makes her happy, but he's her ex. I automatically get jealous and insecure. He's older, he's a celebrity, they've known each other longer. I'm just some girl from the X Factor that she had to mentor, it's like I'm just some charity case.

I've always been so insecure about it, but she always told me otherwise, and I actually believed her.

But I don't know what to believe anymore." My voice was starting to get shaky, I honestly don't understand how I made it that long with out tearing up, and I'm not even done yet.

I guess this is what it's like to be numb.

"I walked in, hoping to surprise her, but things worked out differently.

She didn't even notice me. She was too busy shoving her tongue down Wilmer's throat.

I ran. I slammed the door and took off. I heard her screaming, but she was most likely sacred that someone had opened her door.

I kept running, not once looking back. I gave up and just threw myself on the ground. I had been crying so much, and the running didn't make it any easier to breath." I hated how that sounded.

_'She was too busy shoving her tongue down Wilmer's throat.'_

It sounded so cruel the way I said it, it disgusted me to even have to say that. I just never thought I'd be talking about Demi that way.

"I'm sorry." She leaned in and gave me a hug. She started rubbing circles on my back.

"You give really nice hugs." I tried to lighten the mood, I didn't want this to be so gloomy.


	4. Chapter 4

**I was trying to upload this yesterday but my computer was messing up a lot and then I had to leave. I'm 16 and I spend birthday parties with a group of 9 year olds while everyone else is talking lol, I regret nothing(:**

**Anyways, thanks so much for reviewing, like you don't even understand how much they mean to me. I'm already working on chapter 6, so idk if I should post chapter 5 today. I hope you enjoy this chapter(:**

* * *

**Selena's Pov**

It surprised when she wrapped her arms around me. I knew that something was bothering her the moment I heard her voice crack when I called her earlier.

I rubbed her back and pulled her into me even more. I wanted to be able to comfort her. I could see the sadness in her eyes.

"You're gonna be okay." I whispered into her ear as we made our way to the exit.

I was nervous about this. I've been regretting this since the moment I woke up.

I'm pretty sure I didn't properly think this out. I know what I want to get out of this conversation, but there's so many different ways things could play out.

Jennel is kind of the opposite of Demi. Jennel doesn't exactly act out on impulse, she'll think things through before making a choice. She's a lot more calm, which kind of gives me hope.

"Where are we going?" She snapped me out of my thoughts.

I forgot I hadn't even said anything to her. The last words we spoke were at the airport. I've just been lost in my own little world.

"A coffee shop. I mean if that's okay?"

"Yeah it's fine. Thanks for, this."

"You don't need to thank me. I should be thanking you for giving me the opportunity to be able to talk to you." She nodded and smiled.

* * *

"I'm in heaven. This doughnut is perfection."

"Wight? Twis ish dwefintly the best donwuts I've ever had." We just stare at each other and break out into a fit of laughter, causing some old lady to hush us.

I swallow the mouthful of doughnut I still had and we continue laughing a bit more. It lightened the mood, which makes it a bit easier. Here goes nothing.

"Demi told you everything right?"

"I hope she did. You're scared of telling her something? "

"Does it really seem that simple?"

She basically summed everything up, and me not telling Demi I like her is the main thing. It seems like it's not a big deal, but to me it is.

"I don't know. That's how it seems, but obviously to you it isn't that simple because you haven't been able to tell Demi. I think you should though, because no relationship should have secrets."

"I wanna tell her. I've wanted to tell her for years, but I just can't. It would change our friendship. I don't wanna lose her."

"But you're gonna lose her if you keep things from her."

That did it. She already has me close to tears. I know she's right, but I just can't tell her.

"I'm sorry Selena, did I say something?"

"N-no. Just, Demi."

"You're gonna be okay." I smiled, realizing those were the words I had said to her earlier. It kinda gave me that push to keep talking.

"She said that to me. That I'm gonna lose her if I keep things from her. I just don't know anymore. I want to tell her, but I could lose her if do. Either way I'll lose her in the end."

"And what if she doesn't leave you? What if she doesn't change? Demi's been through so much, she's in no position to judge, and you know that she wouldn't."

"I know, and I kinda need your help."

"My help?"

"Yeah. I don't wanna lose Demi, and I thought you could help me. I don't know if you could maybe convince her or something?"

"Why should I? I can't force Demi to be friends with you."

"I'm not saying that, like just make her be not so hard towards me. She texted me earlier today, she was in a good mood. We were joking around like nothing happened, but I know she won't let it go that easily."

"Okay. I'll see what I can do." I smiled at her.

That's the only thing I could think of doing in that moment. I don't want to lose Demi yet, and I know Jennel will help me. Maybe she won't do it for me, but for Demi, and something is better than nothing.

Are you serious? I could have sworn my phone was on vibrate. Jennel starred at me, I gave her a cheeky grin along with a blush.

"Is it bad that I wanna laugh right now?" I shook my head from side to side.

I tried holding back a laugh but failed terribly. I'm embarrassed, but at the same time I'm not. I'm not ashamed, that's been my ringtone for her ever since we recorded that song. I guess I'm just embarrassed because someone knows now.

"You know, that's her ringtone whenever you text or call her. You guys are so cliche. You're one and the same."

"Are you serious? I didn't think she would have that as her ringtone."

Demi is just full of surprises, I never would have guessed she'd have One And The Same as her ringtone for me. We're total dorks, and there she goes again, texting me, making my ringtone play once more.

* * *

"So am I taking you to Demi's?" I was nearing Demi's place and I hadn't even asked if I was supposed to take her there.

I'm a lot more calm than I was before. I was still off in my own little world, trapped in my head with all my thoughts, but things worked out better than I thought they would.

"Yeah, please?"

"No prob. I hope this won't be the last time we go out."

"Of course not." She smiles at me, and I smile back.

Now that I know Jennel will help me, it's up to me to fix things with Demi.

I wasn't expecting Demi to text me today. I was actually planning on calling her after I dropped off Jennel, but she beat me to it, and it might be for the best.

Demi made it clear that she wants to give us another shot, I just have to make sure not to fuck things up again. The only way to avoid another fall out is to tell her the truth.

I've tried to. Well it was only once, but Chloe interrupted us that time. I would have told her in that moment that I liked her, but what would have happened? There's so many different ways that could have ended.

But now? How would that even work out? We're both in relationships, and it's not like she would confess that she's in love with me. There wouldn't be a happy ending. I know for a fact that she would accept me. I mean why wouldn't she? I'm her best friend, and she's bi, and she's dating a girl, it would be very hypocritical of her to not. I'm just not sure when I should take the risk of telling her.

"Selena, I, well. Um." I take my eyes off the road to look at Jennel, but I make sure to keep an eye on it as well.

"What's wrong?"

I couldn't help but sigh. I don't wanna talk about it, but at the same time I do. It hurts a lot to keep thing bottled up.

"Just a lot on my mind."

"No shit. Seriously Selena, what's wrong? It's not good to keep everything in. I know you wanna talk about it."

"I can't."

"You can't or you won't? Look I have nothing against you, I respect you and whatever you say stays between us. Demi doesn't even know I'm with you, hell she doesn't even know I'm back in LA. I lied and told her I'd be back tomorrow."

"I like Demi, and I think I always have. There you happy!"

I didn't mean to yell, I was just so frustrated. I pretty much reached my limit. I don't think I regret what I said, because I mean it, I just kinda wish I hadn't told her of all people.

"What?"

"I like Demi okay? You have nothing to worry about because I wouldn't dream of getting in the way of your relationship. That's why I left Demi. That's always been the reason for our fall outs, because I like her more than a friend!" My screams turned into sobs.

It's out there, and I can't take it back. I feel like a table was just lifted off of my shoulders.

We had just arrived at Demi's apartment, my body was still shaking.

I parked the car but didn't face her, I couldn't. I just sat there and held my face in my hands as I continued to sob. I felt her arms on my back as she brought me into a hug.

I hugged her back and rested my head on her shoulder, soaking her shirt with my tears,

"It's okay Sel, just let it out." I took a deep breath and pulled away.

"I'm sorry." It's the only words I was capable of speaking.

"There's nothing to be sorry for."

"Yes there is. I've hurt Demi because of this. I fell for my best friend Jennel! Do you not understand that?! And I just told you, of all people I told you! You're Demi's girlfriend for crying out loud,I'm stupid! You probably hate me! I'm sorry." Things were getting bad.

I get easily nervous, and right now I'm a total mess. I can barely breathe from all the sobbing and screaming I'm doing.

She hugged me again, and I tightly held on to her. I needed the comfort, but I don't deserve it.

"You should be mad at me." I mumble against her shoulder.

"I'm not mad. I kinda always knew. I had my suspicions, but you just confirmed it, and I'm okay with it. You can't help who you fall for right? As cliche as it sounds it's true."

She knew? She knew?! How could she know?

"Y-you knew?" I pulled away once again. Her hands immediately went up to my face as she brushed away the tears.

"Yeah. It just all adds up. You were jealous of Demi spending time with her coworkers, and you kinda overreacted when you um saw us on the beach.

I've noticed the way you look at her, your eyes automatically light up. Whenever her name came up in our conversation just now, I would catch you smiling. You're not very subtle."

Yeah, definitely not subtle.

"We're cool though right?"

I want us to be, I'd hate for things to change between us.

"Yeah. There's no reason for us not to be. I know you wouldn't get in the way of my relationship with Demi, and I"m not gonna treat you any differently. Surprisingly,I'm not even jealous of you spending time with her. You're not a problem, but-"

"Wilmer might be?" I finished her sentence.

"How did you know?"

"He makes Demi happy, and she'd leave me for him sometimes. I understood though because they were in a relationship, but when you left the first time I came over and saw them together. And then he went to the set of X Factor and they took pictures together."

I know how she feels, to know the person you love is spending time with someone else.

But I don't love Demi, do I? Maybe, I mean she's my best friend, of course I love her, but do I love her more than a friend?

"But whatever she loves you, she always talks about you. I've never heard anything bad about about you. And even when she complains about you, which is hardly ever, she says it's cute. The girl is head over heels in love with you Jennel."

It pained me to say it, but I knew Jennel needed the reassurance.

"I'm gonna go. Thanks for, well everything."

"We're okay though right?"

"Yup. I'll treat this as if it never happened, if that's okay with you?"

"That's more than okay. Thanks Jennel, for being here for me. It really means a lot to me." She leaned over the arm rest and pecked my cheek.

I watched her as she walked out. She turned to wave at me and I waved back. I started the car as soon as she made it to the door.

She's so calm about this, it's scary. I know if someone told me they like my girlfriend I would have flipped, but she didn't. She was so understanding about everything. No wonder Demi's in love with her, Jennel is a total blessing.

I wonder if Demi will ever feel the same way about me. I wonder if I'll ever have the same affect on her that she has on me. I'll never know, but what does it matter? She's in love with Jennel, and I'm not stupid enough to get in the way of her relationship.

Even if they weren't together, she'd go back to Wilmer. And I'd stay in the friend zone.

* * *

"If I went to Paris…" Jennel! That's her ringtone, and I can't find my phone great.

I pull over on the side of the road. I still remember when she set it as her ringtone.

We were messing around and she took my phone away from me and gave it to Demi. They basically played monkey in the middle with my phone Jennel recorded herself singing and saved her number as well as setting the bit she sang from Paris as her ringtone.

Demi was almost drooling. Jennel's voice is amazing, she's extremely talented, but Demi wouldn't say that. She'd say she's perfect, I guess that's what love does to you.

"S-selena." By the tone of her voice I kind of regretted finding my phone.

She struggled to speak my name. All she said was my name, but she sounded so, so broken. She was breathing kind of heavy into the phone.

"Jennel? Jennel is everything okay? Are you okay?"

"Come. Please, come pick me up." She hung up on me.

I don't know how I'm even driving right now. It's been raining all day, but it got worse. I can barely see and the roads are slippery.

The fact that I'm nervous doesn't help. My mind is racing a mile a minute. Something happened to Jennel and I don't know what it is. Luckily I hadn't made it too far so it didn't take me too long to get back to Demi's.

I saw a figure laying down next to the entrance. I stopped the car, making sure the lights would illuminate the figure. I slammed the door and ran once I realized who it was.

"Jennel what the fuck happened!" I immediately hugged her.

But she she didn't respond, she didn't look at me, she did nothing.

"Jennel, what happened?" I was trying me best to stay calm, but that seemed impossible at the moment.

I just don't even know what's going. I come and find her soaked, she isn't speaking, she was laying on the grass. Anything could have happened.

"Can you just take me somewhere else?"

"Yeah, come on I'll take you back to my place."

I helped her to my car, there were no words exchanged. She kept her head down, but I could hear the sobs escape her lips every now and then.

What am I supposed to do? Should I call Demi? But would calling her resolve this? Does she have anything to do with this?

I'm panicking. She fell asleep the moment she got in the car. She was shaking so I turned the heat on. Even in her sleep she looks so broken, I can't imagine what happened in such a short amount of time to make her act out this way.

* * *

I really hate to have to wake her up, but we're here.

"Jennel? Jenn wake up?"

I start shaking her arm, but that only makes her face the window.

"Jenneeeel." I actually slap her arm,I didn't want to, but it woke her up

"We're here come on."

She followed me into my house. I kicked my shoes off and started heading towards the stairs, she stood there and looked around.

"Follow me." She walked up the stairs behind me, she hasn't said anything yet. And I'm scared of talking, I don't wanna say something that'll set her off or anything, so I just keep it down to what's necessary.

"I'm not sure if we're the same size, but it'll do for now. You can pick out what you want. Just bring your clothes downstairs so I can put them in the dryer. And I'll take your bag downstairs so I can go ahead and start drying these clothes. I'll be downstairs if you need anything, we need to talk."

"Y-yeah. Sorry, for this."

"Shh no, don't apologize. We'll talk when you get downstairs." I walked out with her bag and left her alone in my room.

I feel a bit more calm now that she's at my house because I can take care of her. But I'm still worried about her. There's just so much I wanna ask her but I don't want her to feel overwhelmed. Like what the fuck happened? I'm just so worried.

I open the door to the dryer and throw her clothes in.

* * *

"You hungry?" She shakes her head and pulls the stool closer to the counter.

"Fine, looks like you'll miss out on my famous cookies." I tease, trying to cheer her up.

"Take your time." I didn't mind being the only one talking, I know she need her time.

I take a seat next to her and place the plate of cookies in front of us.

"Well Demi didn't know I was flying in today, I told her I'd be here tomorrow since you were picking me up.

I knew she had been spending time with Wilmer, and I called her out on it. I told her that we weren't spending too much time together anymore. I know she's busy recording, but she started spending her free time with him. We haven't even been on a proper date in a while. Whenever I want to ask her out to dinner she already has plans with him. I'm okay with it, to an extent.

I'm happy that he makes her happy, but he's her ex. I automatically get jealous and insecure. He's older, he's a celebrity, they've known each other longer. I'm just some girl from the X Factor that she had to mentor, it's like I'm just some charity case.

I've always been so insecure about it, but she always told me otherwise, and I actually believed I don't know what to believe anymore." She stopped talking, I guess it's because her voice was getting shaky.

It's not that I feel bad for her, or look down on her or anything; I just hate that she's felt like that. I feel like that sometimes, I feel so small compared to everyone else, but I'm a celebrity she isn't, it's different.

But Demi isn't like that, she isn't shallow. She wouldn't leave Jennel because she isn't famous, Demi isn't one to toy with people's emotions.

"I walked in, hoping to surprise her, but things worked out differently. She didn't even notice me. She was too busy shoving her tongue down Wilmer's throat. I ran. I slammed the door and took off. I heard her screaming, trying to get me to stop, but it was most likely that she scared that someone had opened her door.

I kept running, not once looking back. I gave up and just threw myself on the ground. I had been crying so much, and the running didn't make it any easier to breath."

Demi kissed Wilmer. Demi fucking kissed Wilmer! What the fuck?! I'm not even mad because it wasn't me, it's the fact she's with Jennel! She doesn't deserve to be hurting like this.

"I'm sorry." I wanted to say a lot more, but I decided against it. I had to control myself because I know I would have made things worse.

I hugged her. I know what it's like to be cheated on, and I know what it's like to see the person you love kiss someone else.

"You give really nice hugs." I pulled away and smiled at her.

"You don't have to pretend to be okay. I know you're not, and I'm here for you.

"Thank you." She whispered. Her voice cracked, but I still heard what she said.

* * *

**Demenaforver13: Lol I want Demena too. It'll happen a lot sooner than you think tho(;**

**RainbowVaneza: ****I died when I saw your review. Like your story is perfection and you actually read mine. Asdfghjkl; excuse my fangirling.**

**LovezObsessed: Sorry to keep you waiting, hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**Suefanficlover: Haha thanks for reviewing(:**

**Aperson3:****Lol sorry(;**

**Pretty Little fiction321:**** I wanna make them closer, but I'm not sure how things are gonna work out.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Well here is chapter 5, I guess there isn't much going on. I'm sorry I didn't upload this sooner, I've been busy and this past week has been absolute hell. I'm thinking of taking a break with this story, but I'm not sure when that'll happen.**

**Anyway chapter 6 is gonna be up real soon, and I know everyone is gonna enjoy it, but there's a lot going on so your opinions are gonna be changing a lot throughout the next chapter lol. **

**Thanks so much for the reviews, they really mean a lot. Oh and I posted a new story called Alone, check it out if you haven't already, I'm gonna try to write the second part to it. Enjoy(:**

* * *

**Selena's Pov**

"Care to explain why you _missed_ your flight?" I made sure to put air quotes around missed.

She had just stuffed her mouth with pancakes, most likely to avoid my question.

We didn't stay up too late last night, we ended up eating more cookies and we watched tv. She had fallen asleep on the couch, and I just couldn't wake her, I could tell she was exhausted. Even though she ended up telling me everything, I could still see the sadness in her eyes. She's looking better now, but we've only been talking for a couple of minutes.

We were both eating breakfast, but I was texting Demi as well. She told me that someone opened the door to her house last night and that she was worried. I just went along with it and asked if she was okay.

"W-what? I don't know what you're talking about."

"Ha, you know exactly what I'm talking about." I unlocked my phone and opened up the conversation I was having with Demi.

**Demi: I know we couldn't go out last night 'cause you had to do something, but since Jennel missed her flight, why don't we go out for lunch?**

**Selena: What do you mean she missed her flight?**

**Demi: Yeah, she texted me saying her flight was actually last night, but she had been at the studio all day. I was really looking forward to seeing her :/**

"I don't wanna face her. I don't know what I'm gonna say, I don't even know what I wanna say." She slid my phone back to me, I could see she was starting to worry again.

"It's better to face things now than later. I could ask her to come over, she wants to talk to me about something, you could talk to her afterwards?"

"Won't she flip that I lied to her?" Even though she was completely heartbroken yesterday, I find it sweet that she's worrying about Demi being mad at her.

"She misses you Jennel, she just wants to see you."

"Right, um so should I like leave while you guys talk?"

"Let me text her and see if she wants to come over."

**Selena: How bout we have lunch at my place today?**

**Demi: Sure, I'll be there at like 1?**

**Selena: Yeah that's fine.**

"She says she'll be here at like one."

* * *

"I don't wanna do this anymore."

"Jennel, calm down you'll be fine." She was sitting across from me, her leg was rapidly bouncing up and down.

"Can I just leave? I need time to clear my head and calm down."

"Yeah, just take my car." I was nervous about this too, but I didn't wanna show it.

I still don't know what it is that Demi has to tell me, I haven't seen her in person since the day she came over to talk about what had happened on New Year's, and her and Jennel could break up. I hope they don't, because they're happy together, but who would I comfort? I wouldn't want Demi mad at me cause I'm with Jennel, or the other way around.

"I don't have my license."

"What? But don't you work on cars? How do you not have your license?"

"I'm a horrible driver." She started laughing, and I only shook my head.

"Just go. You'll be fine, just don't go too far, I'll text you when you should come back."

"Alright. I'll see you soon."

"Don't do anything illegal!" I yell, since she was already walking out the door.

"I'll try my best not to!"

* * *

"You know I saw a car identical to yours when I was headed over here."

"Oh. Wow, what a coincidence huh?" Good thing my windows are tinted, if she would have seen Jennel I don't even know what I would have said.

"Yeah. So what have you been up to? I've missed you." She pulled me into a hug, my entire body began to tingle from her touch.

"N-nothing much. And you?"

"Too much. I just have too much on my mind, it's really frustrating." I pecked her forehead and walked towards the couch, there was no point in us standing there, even though I'd love to be in her arms forever, she wants to talk to me.

"What's on your mind Dems?" She sat on the opposite side of the couch and faced me. I saw her blush when our hands touched as we went to grab the pillow that was between us. That's strange.

"Well first, I wanna apologize for the last time we talked. I've come to the conclusion that I can't force you tell me things just because I wanna hear them. You obviously need more time, and I respect that.

I kinda wanna put that behind us until both of us are completely sure that were ready to talk about the past and open up about it. I'm gonna be performing soon, so I think it'd be a good time for us to be apart and properly think things through."

She's leaving? She wants time apart? That's not fair, I need her.

"Hey now, don't make that face. Be happy, please?" She grabbed my chin and slightly tilted it so I could look at her.

"Sorry. I'm happy for you Demi, I really am. I'm just gonna miss you is all." I smile at her, trying to convince her. There's really no use, she still knows me, I haven't completely changed.

"That smile isn't very convincing."

"Um what else did you need to talk to me about?" I didn't wanna keep talking about the fact that she's leaving. there's no point in it. I have to focus on my own stuff, and Justin, ew.

"Wow, I thought this was another date, you just want me to get straight to it."

"D-date? What. psh no." What is with me today?

"Ha ha chill Sel. I'm just messing with you, but I'm starving, can we eat first?"

"Of course, let's go to the kitchen."

* * *

"Who are you texting?"

"N-no one."

"Are you okay? What's with the stuttering today?" Ugh I wish I knew.

"I don't really know."

"Am I making you nervous?" Nervous? Just a little. I'm more scared of slipping up than anything. She has no clue how much I think about her, and the things I think about her.

"Psh me nervous? Yeah right. Um this sandwich is really good, I think I'm gonna eat more." I take a huge bite, pretty much half of it in my mouth, but it'll buy me some time.

**Jennel: I didn't go too far. I've kinda just been driving in circles. I stopped at McDonald's for some food. You have a nice ass car.**

**Selena: She's beautiful isn't she? Bring me back a milkshake or something. I'll text you back in a little while. I hope you're prepared for whatever it is that's gonna happen.**

"Do you think it's possible to love more than one person at the same time?"

"Yeah, I think it's possible. But I don't think you can be in love with more than one person at the same time."

"I don't know what to do anymore." I hated seeing her like this, but I'm happy she trusts me enough to show this side of her.

"Well tell me, what's going on Demi?"

"I don't know anymore. I can't get over Wilmer. I didn't date Jennel to get over him, I was actually scared of being in a relationship with her. My career didn't matter, it was me, and how I'm scared of falling for someone.

Both Jennel and Wilmer knew how to get passed that, they were able to knock down my walls, but things have changed."

"Do you not love Jennel anymore?"

"No, I love her. I've never questioned my love for her, she means a lot to me, but maybe I'm not in love with her." Ouch.

"Maybe you never tried getting over Wilmer. It could be that you just feel something because he's your ex, you could just like the fact that he's there for you."

"But I kissed him!" I had my doubts, I thought that maybe Wilmer had forced himself on her, I was kinda hoping that was it, for the sake of Jennel, but no, she actually kissed him.

"You what?"

"We've been spending a lot of time together, and we were alone, and he stayed over. So we spent all of yesterday together, and one thing led to the other and then I kissed him. That's when my front door opened and it was the best kiss of my life, I think I've always been in love with him."

She rushed out the last part, maybe so I wouldn't hear it, but what does it even matter, I heard it.

I wanna kiss her, I wanna close the small distance between us and give her a kiss, a kiss that she would consider the best of her life. I wanna give her that kiss that shows all my love, that kiss that can express everything I've ever felt for her, just one kiss, one kiss that won't ever happen.

"O-oh."

"Selena are you o-"

"I really have to pee, I'll be right back." I cut her off and ran down the hall to the bathroom.

* * *

I don't wanna let something slip. I know I won't say anything, but I don't have such good control of my emotions. I was close to crying, what would I even say to her? There isn't a good lie for that, it doesn't make sense for me to be feeling this way,

I take a deep breath and splash water on my face. Suck it up Selena, you're her best friend, nothing more than that and she needs you right now, that's all that matters.

"Sorry, couldn't hold it in any longer."

"Ha ha no problem, I know you have a small bladder."

"Yeah. So um what are you gonna do?"

"I don't know. I'm gonna have to break up with her, it wouldn't be fair. "

"Just like that? She's gonna come back and your gonna break up with her? Demi she loves you, she adores you, your her everything, and I thought she was your everything too."

"I mean I don't want to, but I wouldn't wanna hurt her." You're hurting her already, a lot more than you know.

**Selena: You should start heading back.**

**Jennel: I'm in the driveway actually, is everything alright?**

I look back up at Demi, I can tell she's having a hard time with this. Everything confuses me right now. Jennel and Demi's relationship was so unique, it was so different than any other relationship. They weren't just a couple, they were basically best friends, they were both completely whipped which was cute because they would always spoil each other. From what I've heard from both of them they're total romantics, you could pretty much see the love radiating off of them. But in a couple of minutes that'll become part of the past.

The way they looked at each other gave away everything, if their love was so obvious I wonder how much she loves Wilmer. My stomach is in knots just by thinking about them.

**Selena: I guess? Just come in, I don't have anything to say to her.**

**Jennel: Okay. I got you a strawberry milkshake, I hope it can cheer you up.**

**Selena: I'll be up stairs. Good luck.**

I set my phone down, I don't even know what to say. There's really nothing more to say. Her mind is made up, I know I won't be able to change it.

"Well, it seems like you know what you want to do. It's your relationship, and you know what's best. Ill be with you no matter what."

"O-okay." Her voice was a bit shaky, I don't get why.

"Umn Demi can you give me a few mintues? I need to go take care of something upstairs. "

"Yeah. I'll just stay down here." We both look at each other when we hear the front door open.

I run out of the kitchen and go to the entrance. I didn't hear any footsteps so I'm assuming she didn't follow.

"Thanks for the milkshake, she's in the kitchen. Good luck." I grab the milkshake out of her hand and run past the kitchen. Unfortunately the stairs are right by the kitchen, so I can't avoid Demi.

"Hey where'd you get the milkshake from? I want one."

"Sorry Demi." I quickly run upstairs, but I'm too late.

"Selena Gomez!" Fuck, fuck,fuck.

How do I even play this off? She's gonna find out the truth because I know Jennel is gonna tell her, but I was hoping Demi would wanna talk to her.

"Jennel? What are you doing here? I thought you missed you flight? It's nice to see you again." I stand next to Jennel and rest my arm on her shoulder. She give me a nervous smile and Demi just stares at us.

"Why don't you guys catch up? I'll be upstairs." I suggest and try to sneak out, but Demi grabs my hand; I couldn't help but smile.I tried hiding my smile, but Jennel caught it because I saw her roll her eyes, that only caused me to smile even more. She didn't do it out of jealously, it was playful.

"Someone explain what's happening. I'm happy you're here Jennel, but why are you here?"

"Well, you see I -" I started talking but Jennel cut me off.

"I wanted to surprise you so I kinda lied about my flight. I asked Selena to pick me up from the airport yesterday." Ooo, she's a smooth liar.

"So if you got here yesterday why didn't you come home?" Dammit Demi couldn't you have let it slide.

Jennel looks at me, there's really nothing to say. Neither of of us wanna bring up Wilmer.

"I begged her not to. I wanted to spend some time with her. Isn't that right Jennel?" I wink at her, telling her to play along.

"Yup. That's right, Selena wouldn't take no for an answer. You know how stubborn she can be." She nudges my side and I smile at her. I'm starting to like Jennel a lot more.

Nothing was said after that, unfortunately. We kinda just stood there, I could feel the tension, you could tell both of them were scared. We all know what to expect, and it's really nerve wrecking.

Demi might go ahead and break up with Jennel, and that's kinda what's expected. I know Jennel is hoping for something else.

"I'll leave you guys to talk."

Demi nods, silently thanking me, and Jennel smiles at me.

I walk up stairs, with my milkshake as well. These things are perfection, they're so sweet and good.

I stop once I make it to the top of the stairs and pull out my phone. I would have wanted to say this in person, but I couldn't since they were standing next to each other.

**Selena: Everything happens for a reason, and whatever happens, I'm here for you.**

I send both of them the same message, I hear their phones go off at the same time, so I take that as sign to go ahead and just go to my room.

**Jennel: Thanks.**

**Demi: Thanks Sel, we'll talk later.**

* * *

**Bveronika: Actually chapter 3 was in Jennel's pov, chapter 4 is in Selena's pov.**

**Demenaforever13: Lol I don't even ship Jennel that much anymore. Thanks, I'm glad you enjoy it(:**

**LovezObsessed: Lol yeah Demi is an idiot.**

**RainbowVaneza:I'm sorry I didn't update sooner, but you might get two chapters in one day(:**

**Manhattanpizza: I feel bad for all three of them lol. And yeah Demi fucked up big time.**


	6. Chapter 6

**There wasn't much to add to this chapter so I went ahead and uploaded it. So two chapters in one day means I have no clue when the next chapter will be out lol. I hope you guys enjoy this, it's pretty much a huge roller coaster. I kinda don't like Demi right now lol, but whatever things will get better afterwards. Enjoy and review(:**

* * *

**Demi's Pov**

Should things be this awkward? I had a different idea of how things would play out when she came back. We were supposed to hug and kiss and tell each other how much we missed each other, but we're just standing, not even making eye contact.

I don't know if I should go ahead and just say it, or ask her about her trip. Better now than later.

"I think it's best if we break up."

"I missed you." We both spoke up at the same time.

"Wait what?"

"I think it's best if we break up." I can't believe she just said that.

It's not that I wanted to be the one to initiate the breakup, it's just that it really threw me off. Had things gotten so bad between us that she wants to break up?

I don't even know how to respond. I'm not one bit happy about this, I'm gonna miss her. I love her, I may have cheated on her, but I still love her.

"Why?" My voice was small, I guess I'm hurting a lot more than I think I am.

She sits down and cups the sides of her face with her hands, letting her elbows rest on the counter.

"Is there anything you need to tell me?"

"What? Jennel you didn't answer my question." I sit down in front of her. I kinda wish I didn't, I'm getting a perfect view of her eyes, her dark brown eyes have lost the light they once held, and it's all my fault.

"I'll answer it, but you have to answer my question first."

I never gave it much thought as to if I would tell her what happened with Wilmer. I wanna be honest with her, but does it really matter if she knows?

"N-no. I have nothing to tell you."

"Alright. So kissing Wilmer is nothing?" Damn. How does she even know?

"W-what?"

"I saw you kiss Wilmer. I wanted to surprise you, so Selena picked me up from the airport. When I came home you were on the couch sitting on his lap kissing him. So I ran." Her voice was so shaky, and it broke me to hear her talking that way, it hurts me to see the pain in her eyes, the pain that I caused her.

I'm so speechless right now. I shouldn't have lied to her, I could of just told her straight up. But I shouldn't have kissed Wilmer in the first place.

"I'm sorry Jennel."

"Sorry for what? Sorry that you got caught right?"

"W-what Jennel, I just." I can't even speak properly.

This definitely isn't how I expected things to play out. I don't even know what I was expecting. I knew things wouldn't be easy, but I didn't think they'd be this hard either.

"I love you Demi, I really do, but I guess things just aren't meant to be between us. Everything happens for a reason right?"

"Y-yeah."

"I hope your happy with him, you deserve nothing but the best princess."

I let out a shaky breath. She seems so calm about this, but I'm not, I'm crying. I'm trying my best not to let any cries escape my lips, but it's really hard for them to stay in.

The way she called me princess brought back so many memories. She always treated me like a princess, it was all the little things she did that made me love her. She isn't being fair with this.

She's making it seem like she's to blame, but she isn't. She's never done anything to make me not want to be with her. The only one to blame is me, I fucked things up.

"Jennel, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry things happened the way they did. But don't be like this. You're pretty much blaming yourself for this, but it's all my fault. I fucked things up between us, it's all my fault."

I was shaking, I could tell she was holding back tears. She's so strong, I admire her for that.

"You can't choose who you fall in love with right?"

I don't say anything, I can't. I just watch as she walks upstairs.

* * *

How did I let things end up like this? I don't believe in relationships that last forever, but I thought this would have lasted longer, I wanted it to last longer. I fucked up bad.

Was it the right thing to do? I mean it might be because I wouldn't wanna keep hurting Jennel, but it's not like I'm gonna jump into a relationship with Wilmer right now.

My emotions haven't hit me yet, I just feel kind of empty right now. Jennel was my first actual girlfriend, I had never been romantically involved with a girl before. She made me more confident, she made me feel confident in my own skin. And now she's gone, and it's all my fault.

I'm gonna miss her so much, but I don't even know if I would go back and change things. I don't regret kissing Wilmer, I just wish that Jennel wouldn't have to get hurt in the process.

I heard a door open up stairs so I took a deep breath, trying to make it seem like I'm okay. There's really no point, but I try either way.

"Wait here we have to talk." Selena says to me as she walks past me and heads to the door, Jennel follows behind her.

She's smiling, but I can still see the dried tears on her cheek.

I get up and hide behind the wall, hoping to hear their conversation. I'm getting a pretty good view as well.

Why is Selena holding Jennel's hand? Who does she think she is holding m-, wait she's not mine anymore.

"Thanks, for everything, I don't even know how to thank you, just know that everything you've done for me between last night and today means a lot to me."

"It's okay Jennel, don't worry about it. I hope this won't be the last time we see each other." Last time they see each other? Is she leaving?

"Me too. Thanks, again." Selena pulls Jennel into a hug and gently rubs her back. She makes eye contact with me, but it didn't last long because Jennel pulled back.

I decide to run upstairs. I hate to see her leave, it hurts me to know that I'm making her go. I should be stopping her instead of sitting at the top of the stairs like the idiot I am.

* * *

"Sh-she's gone?" She walked past me into her room.I walked in after her and watched as she turned around to face m.

"I thought you would have gone after her, or at least said goodbye." I did too, but I couldn't bring myself to do it.

"What happened when you guys were together?"

She lets out a long sigh and crawls into bed. I sit next to her and cuddle into her 's bed is so comfortable, like I wouldn't mind spending the rest of my life in this bed.

* * *

**Selena's Pov**

"Sh-she's gone?" Unfortunately, but it needed to happen. I'm really gonna miss her, we had grown so close in such little time. Jennel is such an amazing person, I hate that Demi let her go so easily.

"I thought you would have gone after her, or at least said goodbye."

"What happened when you guys were together?"

I knew she would ask, but I don't feel like talking right now, I know I need to since I told her we needed to talk, but I just don't feel up to it anymore.

"She talked about you. She told me what happened that's it." I know she wanted me to tell her more, but why should I? She fucked her over, and I had to help pick up the pieces.

"I fucked up bad huh?"

"You fucked up big time. Did she not cross your mind at all when you kissed him? Were you only thinking about yourself?"

"Why are you giving me all this shit now?" I could tell she was getting a bit irritated, Demi never likes it when people point out her mistakes.

"I'm sorry Demi, but it isn't fair. I wasn't expecting this to happen so soon. I know she's the one that broke up with you, but do you know how much it hurt her to do that? Do you think she actually wanted to go through with that?

She wanted to come home and fix things because Wilmer had got in the way. She feels small compared to him. She was always been so insecure about your relationship with him, she told me she felt like a charity case."

I couldn't get Jennel's face out of my head she looked so broken when she told me all of this, and now Demi looks just as broken.

It's not my intention to make her guilty, I just wanna make her see what she did was wrong. Jennel didn't deserve to be screwed over like that. It was just a kiss though, it's not like they went all the way. I hope.

"I know what I did was wrong, I really wish things would have been different but they weren't. She's not the only one that's hurting. I love her Selena, I still love her and I hate that she's out of my life now, I hate that I fucked up, but it's done."

"Did you sleep with Wilmer last night?"

Silence. Absolute silence.

"You know, your silence is only confirming it."

"I'm sorry."

"You shouldn't be apologizing to me. Did you even tell Jennel?"

"N-no." Her voice was a bit shaky, and her eyes wouldn't meet mine when she spoke.

I leaned in and pulled her into me. I don't really know what to say or what to think. Part of me is disgusted because I just never really liked Wilmer, and the other part of me kinda feels bad.

I'm not gonna judge her, I never have, but I just didn't know Demi would do something like this. Everyone makes mistakes, it just really surprises me that she cheated. It just makes me think that if we were to ever be together, which won't happen, but if It did, how do I know she won't cheat on me?

"You're gonna be okay. Things are gonna work out for the best." She pulls away and smiles at me.

"I hope so." I couldn't look at her when she spoke. I could feel her breath hit my lips, it was driving me insane. It didn't help that she placed her forehead against mine.

I tried my best not to look at her lips, I know that would make it seem like I wanna kiss her. Even though I do, she doesn't need to know that.

"They will. I promise." She looked at my lips when I spoke, I did it on purpose to see what her reaction would be, and I definitely wasn't expecting her to start leaning.

"I-I um, pee. I have to pee."

* * *

What the hell was that? Was she about to kiss me? There's no way she wanted to kiss me, maybe I'm just imagining things. She probably just feels lonely, I mean she literally just got out of a relationship.

Do I say anything? What was about to happen was obvious, it's not like she can deny it. She started leaning in, you only do that when your'e gonna kiss someone.

She would never kiss me though, no matter how lonely she feels, I'm just her friend, nothing more than that. And she has Wilmer now, she can't go around kissing people like that.

I've been locked in my bathroom for a good five minutes,I'm not sure if she's noticed.

"Sel is everything okay?." Yeah she noticed.

"Demi, are you okay?" I sat next to her again, but I tried keeping my distance.

"Yeah why?"

"I just, because, well."

"Selena you aren't making any sense." Ugh I know, I just don't know how to bring this up.

"W-what was that?"

"What was what?" Why is she playing dumb? She's only making it harder for me to ask her.

"That. Before I went to the bathroom. Were you about to, well you know." I hadn't realized how close our faces were again.

"Oh, um."

"So you actually were about to kiss me?"

She didn't say anything, but she didn't avoid looking at me. I could tell she was embarrassed since she was blushing, but even though she was embarrassed, that didn't stop her.

She slowly leaned in and placed her lips on mine. Her eyes shut as her hand caressed my cheek. I didn't do anything, I just sat there with my eyes wide open.

I have to be dreaming, there is no fucking way this is happening. Things like this don't happen to me, I can't let this happen, even thought i feels so right, it's so wrong.

"Demi." I whisper against her lips, her soft pink lips that were just on mine.

"Selena. I-I'm sorry. I can't do this. I shouldn't have done that." She walks out of my room and runs down the stairs. I run after her, I'm not letting her get away so easily.

"Demi wait! You can't do what? I grab her hand and pull her back inside, I was lucky enough to catch up to her.

"This. The kiss. I don't know what I'm doing. I just know that I enjoyed it too much, and I shouldn't have because I just broke up with Jennel and then I slept with Wilmer last night."

She enjoyed it? She actually liked kissing me? This is too much to handle, all I've wanted is to be able to kiss her, but no in these circumstances. She's crying right now, this is the last thing I wanted to happen.

I just hold her, it's the only thing I can think of doing, I'm in too much shock to say anything. Even though I didn't kiss her back, that was the best kiss of my life. Her touch has such an affect on me,

"You're my best friend, I shouldn't have kissed you.I needed the comfort, but it doesn't make any sense to me. I shouldn't want to kiss you again. I shouldn't have enjoyed it. I shouldn't be feeling all these emotions right now. I'm sorry but I can't." She kisses my cheek and walks out, Did she really just walk out? I barely got her back.

* * *

**Demi's Pov**

"Demi is everything okay? I got here as soon as I cou-." I don't let him finish. I push him against the door and start kissing him.

"Shh. Don't say anything, I need you right now more than ever."

I start kissing him again, letting my hands roam his body. I pull away, only to kiss him again. I need to get rid of her taste. I don't know what I was thinking.

I feel his hands move to my waist, he picks me up and walks to the couch. He's being so gentle and caring, but I'm only using him, well kinda. I want him, but kissing Selena changed everything.

"Please Wilmer." He wasted no more time in undressing me.

"I love you Demi." He looked at me as he placed himself over me.

"I l-love you too."

* * *

**I hate the ending, well kinda. At least Demena shared a kiss(:**

**Suefanficlover: Lol I don't even think she actually wants to be with Wilmer now(;**

**Bveronika: Aw thanks, I hope you liked this chapter(:**

**Demenaforever13: Well Jennel is definitely out of the picture now(;**


	7. Chapter 7

**I'm so so so sorry I didn't update sooner. I've just had way too much going on, I was gonna give up on writing for good, but I just couldn't, it's a huge part of my life now, I can't just stop. Thanks for being patient with me, hopefully the next update won't take as long.**

**I was gonna get rid of Jennel, but you wanted her and Selena's friendship to continue, so they're skyping lol since Jennel is back home.**

**I'm trying to write the next chapter and I'm stuck lol. If you guys have ideas please let me know(:**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter(:**

* * *

**Selena's Pov**

"Demi broke her leg."

"What do you mean she broke her leg?!"

"She tweeted." I haven't had time to get on Twitter; I've been trying to focus on my own stuff. I've been recording nonstop; I'm so excited about my new album, even though it doesn't come out for a few months.

"I thought you knew. She's okay though, see?" Taylor shows me another picture of Demi, except this time she's in a studio.

"Oh." Well at least she's in the studio, it probably wasn't that bad of an accident.

"I thought you guys were talking again?"

"We are, we were. It's just really complicated."

"Spill."

"Sh-she kissed me." She's the first person I've told, and I was actually debating on telling her. I'm just nervous about her response.

"So? I thought you liked her."

"What? Me like Demi? What? Psh no, I'm with Justin, why would I like Demi?" I don't remember ever telling her about Demi, why would she even say that?

"You don't even believe your own lie. And we both know you don't even like Justin anymore, I honestly don't get why you guys are still together. You're much better off without him."

"You're okay with me liking Demi?"

"Of course. She makes you really happy. I've known for a while, I was just waiting for you to tell me." Why is it that everyone knew before I did?

"Thanks Tay, that means a lot to me."

"Come on, you gotta give me more. Did you like the kiss? Did you kiss her back? Are you guys gonna get together?"

"I liked it, a lot. But I didn't kiss her back. She kissed me then ran, but I caught up to her before she could walk out.

She told me she enjoyed it too much, but that she shouldn't be feeling like that."

It's been replaying in my head over and over. Her lips felt so perfect, they were so soft, I could taste her strawberry lip gloss. Ugh, I'd love to have her lips pressed against mine again, maybe this time I can actually make a move instead of sitting there like an idiot with my eyes wide open.

"So I'm guessing you guys haven't talked since it happened?"

"She's been ignoring my phone calls and messages. I have no way of talking to her. I'm pretty sure if I go to her house Wilmer is gonna be there, and he's the last person I wanna see."

"You guys need to talk. It's not fair to either of you. Demi might feel something for you, but she's denying it, and you're pretty much in love with her, she needs to know."

"What? Taylor are you crazy? I can't tell her I like her. No, that's not gonna happen, it's not that easy."

"And why not? I don't see why you can't tell her. She made the first move, it's not like you scared her off, she got scared on her own."

"Okay. Let's say I tell her, nothing would come out of it. She's in love with Wilmer not me. That kiss was a mistake, it wasn't supposed to happen."

"Either way it happened, and even though you didn't kiss back, the two of you enjoyed it."

"I don't know Taylor. I don't want things to get awkward between us. I just got her back."

"Yeah but you're letting her walk out. You might lose her now if you don't do something."

She's right. But I'm not sure why I should tell her. I don't really understand why she needs to know. She probably doesn't like me; it's probably something that happened in the heat of the moment.

"Cheer up Sel. Things are gonna work out between the both of you, they always do."

* * *

"I didn't think I'd miss you this much. And to think that I was jealous of you at one point."

"I know, who wouldn't be jealous of me? I'm fabulous." Jennel dramatically flips her hair, I automatically burst out laughing.

"Idiot! How'd it go in the studio today?"

"I don't know. It was good? I mean, I don't know. Singing brought back a lot of emotions, but this song is my way of letting go."

She didn't seem as sad anymore, it's good to see she's not beating herself up for the break up. I know that Demi definitely isn't.

"When are you gonna release an album?"

"Summer? I'm not too sure yet. I just finished another cover; I'll probably release that this weekend."

"I'm so proud of you! What song?"

"You'll find out soon."

"But I wanna know now. Please?"

"You 'Oughta Know."

"I 'oughta know what?"

"Haha, no! That's the name of the song." I really am an idiot. But I'm just happy to see her laughing. Her laugh is a bit loud, kind of like Demi's.

"Oh. Whoops. Well I'm looking forward to hearing it, I know you'll sound great."

"Thanks." I noticed a change in her facial expression; it went from cheerful to sad in a matter of seconds.

"What's wrong Jen?'

"It's just Demi, she had been so excited about me releasing a song, and now, well now things are different."

"Hey, I'm pretty sure Demi is still just as excited, she wants nothing but the best for you. If it helps I'm proud of you too."

"Thanks. H-have you talked to her? Is she okay?"

I knew this would happen, I knew she would ask, but I don't know how I'm gonna answer. I know she can read me, and I already took long to reply so she knows something's up.

"You guys haven't talked, have you?"

"Not exactly. I haven't heard from her since the day you left. I know she broke her leg, but that's only 'cause Taylor showed me. She's okay though, it doesn't seem too bad."

"Oh, yeah I saw the pictures. I thought things were getting better between you two, what happened?"

How do I respond to that? I don't want it to seem like I'm trying to rub it in her face or anything, but what else do I say?

"She kissed me, and then she left. I haven't talked to her or seen her since the day you left."

"She kissed you? What the hell? I'm not mad or anything, I'm just really shocked. That was just so unexpected, I mean I know she liked you, but I didn't think she'd kiss you. Especially now since she's with Wilmer. Demi is full of surprises." Apparently she isn't the only one.

I honestly wasn't expecting this reaction from her. I know Jennel is a calm person, but I was kind of expecting her to go off or something. At least she's not mad; this makes things a lot easier on me. Well kind of, I could have sworn she said Demi liked me.

There's no way that's true, it just can't be true. There's no way Demi ever liked me, this isn't a fairy tale, I can't get the girl to like me that easily.

"Demi liked me?" She nods, I can tell she's trying to hold back a smile, and I know I am too.

"You look like a little kid on Christmas morning right now. Yes, she liked you. I don't know if she still does, but she made it clear that she liked you at one point. Last year when we were all at the park for some strange reason, she told me about you. She told me everything that happened, and then one thing led to the other and I ended up showing her a video of you two. It was a fan-made video of your vlogs, a lot of people want you together.

Demi has always been my celebrity crush, but I'm not gonna lie,I kind of always secretly shipped you guys."

Had I not been in so much shock I would have teased her about her shipping us, but I just can't right now, I can't even speak.

I've thought a lot about Demi and my feelings towards her, I knew that I always felt something more but I didn't pay too much attention, not till she was becoming more famous.

I was happy for her achieving her dreams, but that meant she was spending less time with me. I began missing her a lot more than I should have, and jealousy began to take over. All the time we spent apart made my feeling grow for her, because I realized how much I needed her by my side, but even then I didn't accept my feelings for her right away.

It was so confusing to me, it's wrong to like my best friend that way, but to me it felt right, being with her has never felt wrong. Thinking back to how we were before I could understand why people would have wanted us together.

It was always there, in our vlogs, or interviews, there was just something about the way we acted with each other that made it seem like we were interested in each other. I know that I was, well am, but I don't know about her.

I would constantly touch her, I would accidentally on purpose let my hand touch hers, or I would stroke her hair. Whenever we had sleepovers I'd wake up with Demi sleeping in my arms. I guess it's just all the little things.

It's interesting once you piece everything together, it makes it seem like there was always something there. Maybe there was, because she would do the sweetest things for me.

She always took care of me when I was sick, she wouldn't let me leave my bed or do anything. She's always been so protective of me, especially when I started dating Justin. I know she didn't really like him, but she was nice to him so she could please me because she knew how much that meant to me. She just always wanted the best for me.

"Hey you okay?" I looked up at the screen once I heard Jennel's voice. I had been so lost in my thoughts I completely forgot we were Skyping.

"Sorry, I zoned out. It's just a lot to take in."

I can't help but wonder what would have happened if I would have talked to her about. What would have happened if I opened up to her and told her I liked her? If she did like me would she have said yes or would she have said no? There's just so many scenarios playing in my head, I'm tired of what ifs. There's nothing I can do about it know, I took too long, and now she's with Wilmer.

"You should have told her how you feel about her; you need to tell her before it's too late." It's like she read my mind just now.

"But isn't it already too late? I've liked her for years; I've known for years how I feel about her, what difference does it make from me having told her before to telling her now?"

"The difference is the she didn't kiss you before, that's a huge difference, you need to tell her. What does it matter if she's with Wilmer? She only wants you to be honest with her, and that's what you're gonna do."

"But it isn't that easy. I don't wanna get in the way of her relationship, I just want Demi to be happy, and obviously she's happy with Wilmer, that's all that matters."

"Do you actually think she's truly happy with Wilmer? Or is that your way of avoiding confrontation?" She looked at me, waiting for an answer.

She had never talked to me like this, it was different, it kind of took me by surprise. I can tell she's getting impatient, I get why though, we're pretty much going in circles.

Am I really that much of coward that I can't tell Demi how I feel about her? Jennel is right; things are different now because she kissed me. Before I never knew if she was interested in me, and now I do. She didn't kiss me just to kiss me, that's what I keep telling myself because I can't face the truth. She said so herself that she enjoyed that kiss, and she wanted to do it again, but she was feeling something she shouldn't be, which is why she ran off.

"Both. Isn't that why you left her, because you wanted her to be happy?"

"Yes, but no. I know we could have fixed things, I could have stayed there, but that would have given her another chance to fuck me over, and I wasn't gonna let her break me again.

She wanted him not me, simple as that. I wasn't gonna stop her, I would have fought for her, but there was no way I would compete for her. Demi's a person, not an object."

Damn, this girl is smart, she had everything figured out. Demi was an idiot to fuck her over like she did. I still can't believe that Demi let her walk away so easily.

Jennel trusted Demi, and she broke her, she'll most likely do the same to me. But it doesn't matter, I won't know if I don't take a chance right?

"I'm gonna call Demi, and I'll see where things go from there."

"We'll talk later, well tomorrow since it's late."

"No please. I mean can you stay on, please?" I don't know why I'm begging her not to hang up, I just don't know what's gonna happen once I call Demi.

"Okay."

"I'm sorry Jennel, I just I don't wanna be alone."

"It's okay Sel, you don't have to explain." She smiles and I smile back.

* * *

"Hey Demi, how's it going?" She finally picked up. I'm not sure if she was ignoring me, or she actually didn't hear her phone, but whatever, I'm just glad to hear her voice again.

I look up and see Jennel moving her hands, most likely trying to get my attention. She mouths for me to put in on speaker, I can't help but laugh at how weird she looked doing that.

"I'm fine." Ouch, two words. Is that really all I can get?

"Is your leg okay?"

"It's getting better." Three words, hey at least we're improving.

"Oh that's good. I hope you get better soon."

"Yeah. Look I now you didn't call me to make small talk about my leg, what do you want?" What do I want? What's her fucking problem?

"I just wanted to talk to you. You've been ignoring me for weeks, I wanna know why."

"Selena you know why so don't play dumb." Whoa, what crawled up her ass? Demi hardly ever talks to me like that, something's up.

"I'm not playing dumb Demi, I don't know what I've done to make you ignore me."

"Because I kissed you."

"Exactly you kissed me, I didn't kiss you; it doesn't make any sense for you to leave me."

"Does it matter?"

"What? Of course it matters, you're my best friend Demi, I just got you back."

"I have to go."

"What? Demi, please don't be like this. I don't want things to fall apart again. We need to talk about this Demi, just please don't hang up."

"There's nothing to talk about. I kissed you because I was lonely okay? I had just gotten out of a relationship, I was hurting and I desperately needed the comfort."

"B-but, you said that-"

"I know what I said, and I didn't mean any of it." She cut me off before I could say anything.

I feel like absolute shit right now. I was trying so hard to not lose my temper because I knew that would make things worse, especially with the mood she's in, but I don't even feel mad anymore. I'm just lost.

"That kiss meant nothing to me. Did you think it actually meant something? Did you think you could call me and tell me you like me or something and we'd end up together? You're so wrong, I don't like you and you don't like me. There's nothing more to talk about."

"Demi, I, no. Please?" I was crying into the phone.

"Bye Selena." Her voice showed no emotion. What just happened?

"Sel?" I completely forgot about Jennel. At least there's still someone that cares about me.

* * *

"I don't what to do with myself. I'm so lost right now, so confused, I don't even know what to think anymore."

"Hey, you're gonna be alright."

"I don't think I will. You heard everything Jennel, you heard the anger in her voice. The kiss meant nothing to her, she doesn't like me and she pretty much wants to know nothing about me. I'm lucky I didn't tell her anything because I'm pretty sure she would have made fun of me."

"You can't leave things like this."

"You think I want to? It hurts me so much to know she doesn't wanna talk to me anymore. I don't think there's anything to do anymore.

I haven't done anything wrong. I didn't get mad at her for kissing me, I haven't been a bitch to her, I haven't given her a reason to be mad at me. I don't know what the hell happened to her tonight."

"I don't either to be honest. I know that Demi has a really, really bad temper, but there's a lot more to what she said.

You're right in saying you haven't given her a reason to be mad at you, and she isn't mad at you. She's most likely in denial. She's not ready to accept everything that's happened, everything has changed too fast and it frustrates her that she has no control over it."

I think she's right, I want to believe her but I can't, not when Demi's voice keeps playing in my head. I keep trying to shake it off; I don't really feel like crying again.

Something happened to Demi, and maybe Jennel's right saying that she's in denial. I'm not trying flatter myself by saying that she does like me, but Demi doesn't accept things as they are. Unfortunately her health problems are example of that.

She always knew what she was doing was wrong, she knew it was dangerous, but she didn't want to seek help at the time, she wasn't ready to confront her problems, just like she doesn't wanna confront her feelings for me, just how I wasn't ready to confront my feelings towards her. We might be in the same boat.

"I wish you were here." I really need someone physically here for me. My mom and Brian are out of town, and I'm not gonna call Taylor to come back, it's late and she's tired. I shouldn't even be talking to Jennel, she's ahead of me by three hours; it's a lot later for her than it is for me.

"You'll be fine without me Sel, you're strong."

"But I feel weak."

"But you're not. You're a lot stronger than you're giving yourself credit for. You'll get through this, things are gonna get better. You and Demi always find a way to fix things, you always end up together. This time is no different."

We always find our way back to each other; I guess this is just another bump in the road. But I don't even know how to go about it, should I ignore it? I don't want to, but maybe our time isn't now.

It makes sense; maybe things will work out later on. I did what I could, she's the one pushing me away, and I don't wanna anger her even more. I guess I'll just back off for now and focus on my own stuff.

* * *

**Demenaforever13: Lol I wish, I just don't like him, but he has to stay :|**

**Bveronika: Selena and Jennel in relationship has crossed my mind, but nah, it wouldn't be right.**

**VeehXD: Lol sorry for the wait, hope you enjoyed it(:**

**RainbowVaneza: Lol sorry I took long lol. Hope you liked this chapter, hopefully the next one doesn't take as long.**

**LovezObsessed: Lol it's cute to see your frustration. Yeah I kinda don't like Demi, and you might like her a lot less with what happened in this chapter.**

**Suefanficlover: Yeah, Demi is screwed up right now lol. You'll find out why soon enough, Jennel seems to have Demi figured out.**

**Manhattanpizza: Lol join the club, I'm tired of Demi's shit too lol(:**

**Thanks so much for the reviews, you guys are amazing(:**


	8. Chapter 8

**Heeeeeeeeeeeey. Lol I'm so so so sorry I didn't update sooner. Like I got sidetracked with all this other stuff and I didn't even know what I was trying to do with this chapter so I basically deleted the end. Um I have a good amount of the next chapter written on my phone so I'll get to that when I can.  
But thanks for being patient with me(:**

* * *

**Demi's Pov**

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just kinda tired." I reply and pull the blanket over me as I shift to lay on my side.

"But you barely do anything."

"I guess I'm just tired of not being able to do anything. There's only so much you can do with a broken leg."

"Cheer up babe, you're recovering fast, you'll get the cast taken off sooner than you think." He pecks my forehead and settles down next to me.

At first I thought we were taking things too fast, but it's different with us, we already had a past, the feelings were never really gone, I think we were just pushing them away, at least I was.

I can't help but play with the ring on my finger. It's different to see something on it, I had gotten use it to it being bare, but now a promise ring is in its place. It makes me happy to know Wilmer loves me enough to get us matching rings, but it scares me at the same time.

I shouldn't be thinking about Selena so much when I'm with Wilmer. I was such a jerk to her, it still hurts me to know how bad I hurt her that day. She was crying into the phone begging me to not hang up, but I did it either way.

Everything's changed, it changed way too fast and I don't know if it's for the best or not, but there's really nothing I can do about it. I don't even know what to think anymore, I just feel so lost and confused about everything that's happened.

Jennel is gone, and it kills me to think about her. I didn't even tell her to stay, I let her walk out without putting up a fight. I completely fucked her over, she didn't deserve it. I miss her so much it hurts, I thought I'd be better off with Wilmer, but I'm not. I can't be happy with someone when someone else is occupying my thoughts.

But even if I didn't go back to Wilmer, I could have stayed with Jennel, and I'd probably be thinking about kissing Selena. It wouldn't work out right, no one would be happy.

"Babe what's wrong?"

I shake my head, signaling that nothing is wrong.

"Demi you're crying. What's wrong?" I hadn't even realized I was crying till Wilmer pointed it out. I was too busy lost in my thoughts.

"I'll tell you later. Do you think you can drive me to the studio?"

* * *

"Demi? What are you doing here?"

"I just needed to get something out. I know we already recorded the song last month, but do you think I could sing it again? We don't have to replace it, unless you want to-"

"Demi breathe. It's fine, go ahead and go on in, I'll set everything up."

"Thanks, it means a lot."

"No problem Demi." He opens the door for me and walks behind me. I walk straight to the mini fridge and get out a small bottle of water. My throat's a bit dry, and I kinda want this recording to come out right.

"Alright, ready when you are." I put the bottle down and walk to the center of the room.

It's interesting how a room can have so much affect, there's so much that can be done in here. I could have gone somewhere else, but it wouldn't be the same, I need to be here, I need to get rid of all these feelings, maybe it isn't the proper way, but it buys me time until I'm ready to talk to Selena.

"Puttin' my defenses up  
'Cause I don't wanna fall in love  
If I ever did that  
I think I'd have a heart attack"

* * *

"I know you said you didn't mind if we changed the recordings, but I think we should use this one instead of the first one. The way you sang it this time was so different compared to the first, your voice has more emotion to it. Are you okay with that?"

"Y-yeah. Thanks Bill, I wasn't expecting to change it, but hey if it sounds better go ahead."

"Alright Demi, see you soon." He waves at me as I walk out into the hallway.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't proud of myself right now, I can't wait to release this song, it means a lot to me. It describes me perfectly, I'm scared of falling in love so I put my defenses up, it's basically what I'm doing right now.

I don't do it on purpose, it kind of just happens on its own. I'm determined to fix things with Selena, especially now since I've already given it so much thought, but I don't even know what I would say. I fucked up bad, I hurt her and that's the last thing I ever wanted to do.

Selena's one of the many people that I think about, but it amazes me how one person can take over your thoughts. She's constantly on my mind, and I'm okay with that. I definitely have to fix things before they get even worse. I'll just call her and see where things go from there.

_"Cause we're one and the same_  
_We're anything but ordinary."_

Speak of the devil, what is she even doing here? I can't believe that's her ringtone for me, she's just as stupid as I am. Well she isn't stupid, I'm stupid, she's just cute.

She hung up on me, ouch. I could always go and talk to her, but I'm scared she might be mad at me and I don't wanna fight with her. I'll just call her again.

_"Cause we're one and the s-"_

Her phone goes off again, but this time she barely lets it ring. This isn't fair, how do I fix things when she's ignoring me? Wait, that's what she was trying to do with me. Karma's a fucking bitch.

"Hello?" Is she talking to me?

"Justin can you come pick me up?" Nope, she's not. She's talking to her boyfriend. Ew.

"Jennel. Jennel Garcia, why?" I wish I could hear both sides of of the conversation instead of just one. What does Jennel have to do with them? I knew they talked, but I didn't think they'd keep talking even after she left.

"Oh, um the song is called Y'Oughta Know. Her cover's on YouTube it's amazing if you haven't heard it yet." Jennel released her cover already? That's not fair I haven't even heard it yet.

"Oh, wow okay. I'll call her when I get home, I wanna be the first to tell her. Thanks so much babe that means a lot to me, I'm sure she'll be excited to hear the good news."

"Cause we're one and the same  
We're anything but ordinary One and the same "

"Demi?" I hadn't even realized I had dialed her number again, I'm lucky she answered.

"Selena, hey." I start walking away from her, but not without getting a good look at her. She's smiling, quite big actually, I can't help but smile, luckily she doesn't see me since she's walking towards the entrance, I'll just take the back exit.

"How are you?"

"Um." Great I'm already freezing up. I was sure she wouldn't answer so I didn't think about what I would say.

"Demi?"

"S-sorry."

"Is everything okay?"

"A-are you busy tonight?" What's with the stuttering? I'm usually the confident one and I can't even speak without messing up.

"Demi." She sighs my name, and I automatically take it as a bad sign.

"Selena, I ju-"

"Demi, stop. You can't just call me after ignoring me and expect that I'll go out with you. I'm not giving in so easily. Do you not remember how you talked to me that day? Do you not remember how I cried, begging you to hear me out? Or did you forget?"

She didn't scream at me, she didn't raise her voice, and she wasn't rude to me, but she didn't need to be, her tone gave away her feelings, it gave away her pain, and hearing her voice slightly crack was enough to hurt me as well.

"I didn't forget, bu-"

"But what Demi?"

"I'm sorry Sel, I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Bye Demi."

"Selena please!"

"Demi, you can't do this to me. You can't call me like this, you know I'll give in. You know I can't be without you and you use that to your advantage."

"What? Selena what are you talking about?"

"Just forget it."

"Selena I can't. Stay where you are."

"What?" I start walking a lot faster, well more like limping. Stupid cane, at least it's helping me keep my balance otherwise I would have tumbled over.

I limp to the front of the building and find Selena sitting on the bench looking around, probably for me.

"I didn't mean for things to happen like this." I keep walking towards her, the streetlight is directly over her so I have a pretty good view of her face.

"It's too late."

"Is it really?" I stand in front of her, my phone is still next to my ear. She looks up at me and smiles.

"I think it might be." She speaks one last time into the phone and hangs up. I place my phone in my pocket and sit down next to her.

"I'm really sorry Selena."

"I know, and I forgive you, but that doesn't mean I haven't forgotten."

"I understand." I really do understand, I don't expect to forget everything that happened, I'm just happy she forgave me.

"I don't wanna leave things like this." I speak up before she has a chance to respond.

She lets out a shaky breath and shakes her head. I watch her hands as the white from her knuckles become visible, her hands are balled up. I don't know if she plans on swinging, but I don't think I would even mind.

She stretches her hands and deeply sighs. I hear her sniff a bit and I notice she's crying. I slide over till our knees are touching and gently place my hand on her thigh.

"Demi, don't. I'm sorry. I don't want things to be like this either but I think it's for the best. Maybe things are better like this, maybe we need to be away from each other."

"What? No Selena please, I need you in my life."

"Just please Demi, try to understand where I'm coming from."

"And where exactly is that? You're not telling me anything Sel. I get that I fucked up, but I wanna know what's going on with you." I reach for her hands and look up at her. I'm desperate to kiss her again, but I can't do it. It feels so right, but now isn't the time.

"I just want time apart Demi."

"No you don't. I know you don't want things to be like this."

"Just please, leave. We need more time apart, I mean it Demi. Yeah it hurts because I like being with you, but it's for the best. We need time to figure things out."

"Figure things out? What's there to figure out? I want you and you want me, what's there to figure out?" Crap, that didn't come out right. I don't even know how to fix that.

"I didn't mean, I just, it's just that, well."

"Hahaha." I didn't expect her to laugh at me, but it made things a lot less awkward.

"Sorry."

"Don't be, it was cute. I get what you mean, at least I think I do."

"Give me a chance?"

"For what?"

"To prove, to show, to." To what? I don't even know what I'm trying to say. I'm trying so hard to not slip up, but it seems almost impossible right now.

I'm not sure what I'm trying to get at right now. I want her to give me a chance, but what's there to prove? How much I like her? How much I need her in my life? I can't tell her yet, chances are she doesn't even like me. But either way I already kinda told her when I kissed her. It wasn't even just the fact that I kissed her, but I told her I was feeling something I shouldn't. How am I supposed to get myself out of this one?

"I don't even know what I'm saying right now. I guess I'm just trying to apologize. Selena I didn't mean anything I said, and I didn't want to hurt you the way I did.

I was a total jerk to you, but I'm serious when I told you I didn't mean any of it. I was just putting my defenses up." Can I get any cornier? Well she doesn't know I'm using a line from my song,.

"I don't get why you have to."

"It's complicated, but I just want you to know that everything I said the last time we talked was a lie. It wasn't me talking."

"Oh, let me guess it was your evil twin?"

"Would you believe me if I said yes?"

"Shut up dork. If you say it was a lie, does that mean that everything you said after you kissed me was the truth?"

Do I tell her? Should I tell her? I wanna take that risk and not care about what's gonna happen, but that might result in me leaving her, and I don't want that to happen.

I hadn't even realized we were still holding hands till she started rubbing circles on my hands with her thumbs. I looked back at her and smiled which she returned , I guess she had the same thought. We didn't bother pulling away, it felt right to me, it always has.

"Justin's here." I spoke up as I saw his car entering the parking lot, I could easily identify his car, he's so arrogant about it.

I get up, and tug her along with me. We walk to the curb and wait for Justin to pull up. I still haven't said anything, I guess this is my way of stalling.

"Demi? Hey, how's it going?"

"Hey Justin, I'm great. I ran into Selena on the way out and decided to keep her company till you got here."

"Thanks Demi. We gotta get going, I hope to see you soon."

"Me too, it's been too long." How I got through that conversation I will never understand.

He's a good guy, I guess, but I just don't like him for Selena, she's better off with me.

"Your highness." I open the door for her and stand behind it waiting for her to get in.

"I'm sorry Demi." I nodded, telling her I understand. I wish things didn't have to be this way, but she wants time apart, and I'll give her all the time she needs.

I close the door once she settles down and I lean into the car.

"In our situation, lies are meant to hurt, but the truth isn't. Whatever makes you happy, is the truth." I pecked the side of her head and walked back to the bench. I hope she understands what I'm trying to say.

* * *

**Suefancficlover: Thanks, that means a lot(:**

**Manhattanpizza: Lol yeah, I'd say Demena is gonna happen soon(;**

**LovezObsessed: I know Demi is an idiot. And yeah I feel bad for Selena, but she'll get through it.**

**VeehxD: Lol I think everyone's mad at Demi. But she'll get her shit straight.**

**BVeronkia: I'm gonna try to include it more.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Yooooooo! Alright so this chapter, is just whoa. It was originally longer but I decided to cut come stuff out and make that a different chapter. Um the next chapter should be out soon? I guess? Idk, I'm probably gonna write two versions of the next chapter because it's very important to understand both Demi and Selena's Pov. I guess that's all I have to say. I hope you enjoy(:**

* * *

**Selena's Pov**

It's been three weeks since I last saw her, and it's also been three weeks since she started taking over my every thought.

It had always been that way, throughout the day I would find myself thinking about her, but this time it's different. Before I could have called or texted her and we'd immediately meet up, now I can't.

It's my fault since I'm the one that wanted space, but I think it's for the best, it would benefit both of us.

I feel like Demi doesn't know what she wants and that just really bugs me 'cause I wish I could help her. I wanna be able to listen to all her problems and help her through them, I don't want her to be like this, I really just want her to be happy.

I wanna be the one to make her happy, but how can I? I'm not sure if she even likes me at the moment.

I've been thinking about what she said to me,

_"In our situation, lies are meant to hurt, but the truth isn't. What makes you happy is the truth"_

I still don't get what she means by that. She lied to me, and it obviously hurt, but it's the rest that confuses me.

I didn't even get the time to ask her since Justin was in a hurry. I knew it was something I needed to figure out on my own, otherwise she wouldn't have left me hanging like that. I've been at it for three fucking weeks it's so frustrating.

What does she mean by it? Maybe I'm just over thinking everything, it's something I do a lot. But I just can't crack the code, what does she mean by it?

Even if I do figure it out before the world ends, what does it even matter? She spent Valentine's Day with Wilmer when she could of been spending it with me. It wouldn't have been an official date, because I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have had the confidence to ask her, but we would have hanged out and saw a movie or something.

But no, I spent Valentine's Day alone watching stupid t.v shows that reminded me of Demi because that's all we used to do when we were younger.

_We had just finished editing one of our vlogs and I was stuffing my face with Pringles. _

_She turned to face me and shook her head at me as she took the can away from me. I just smiled and looked at the screen._

_"I don't get it."_

_"Get what?" She asked an turned to face, I could see the confusion in her eyes._

_"You. I don't know, I'm not making sense right now, but there's so much to you. No one would ever think that you could be such a tech geek. I think it's pretty amazing._

_You can act, you can sing, you know how to play and write music. Did I mention you can sing? Because that voice of yours is just damn." She blushed and stared at her lap._

_"L-let's just watch the video." Her voice was shaky, but I could see a smile on her lips._

_I don't know what caused us to make this video, but we just did. Demi and I are such idiots together, it's hilarious to see that this is what we act like when we're together._

_We both started giggling once we saw ourselves bump our heads against each others. She paused it and we started laughing even harder. Words weren't leaving our mouths, it was just weird noise followed my several gasps of air. _

_She pressed play and I got up to pull a chair closer to the desk. I could hear myself and then Demi's laugh as she looked at me._

_"You're an idiot."_

_"And you are too."_

_"Shh. Come here. You didn't have to go get another chair." She patted her lap and I just nodded and walked back to her._

_I sat on her lap and her hands wrapped themselves around my waist. I automatically tensed up and I know she noticed because she rested her chin on my shoulder, which only made it worse._

_I had been trying to keep my distance from Demi, which I guess is why we were being such dorks. I just started paying more attention to the little things that were happening, which probably wasn't the best choice I made because I kept coming up with all these different possibilities and it was different, it was new to me._

_I had heard stupid rumors that Demi and I were together, but they didn't matter to me because Demi's my best friend, and I'm straight, but I started analyzing every little thing, and then I ended up over analyzing everything._

_How quick everything hit me is what scared me, which is why I distanced myself from Demi. But I couldn't keep away for too long, and she had sensed that something was off._

_I couldn't exactly tell her, I don't even know what I would say._

_She slightly pushed her chin into my shoulder-blade to get my attention. I heard a guitar and then the beat of the drums and realized what song was playing._

_I watched how we interacted on the screen. I didn't know the name of the song, but it was familiar. I had heard Demi singing it before but never really paid attention to it._

_She gave me a big cheeky smile as I read the name of the song. I rolled my eyes, she was so obsessed with William Beckett from the Academy Is._

_I didn't expect her to sing, and once she did I started smiling, well more like grinning at the camera. I turned to look at her, and she noticed because she turned to face me as well, but she didn't stop singing._

_She moved away as she held out the note, but only to move closer to me and hug me. She pulled me close to her and I just shook my head and smiled._

_Watching myself with her, seeing how I reacted to everything thing she was doing in like under a minute was interesting. Just by my facial expression I could remember what I was thinking._

_It was in that moment where I realized how everything properly fit. Everything that I had ever thought, everything that had been happening between us, it's because I wanted it to. I wanted to feel a field of butterflies erupt in my stomach whenever Demi was near._

_I wanted Demi. I wanted her and no one else, but I'm not in love with her, but I think I'm falling for her. There's a difference in that, right?_

_'I'm not in love_

_This is not my heart.'_

_What does that mean? My thoughts go back to the lines she sang. Does it even mean anything? He's not in love and that isn't his heart, is he denying his love for a girl?_

_"Sel?!" She shouted after me, but it was too late. I was already walking into her bedroom and I didn't wanna walk back._

_I crawled into her bed and unlocked her Ipod. That's kinda why I left, Demi's so secretive about her Ipod so I disconnected it and lwalked away. I kinda wanna finish listening to that song. _

_I would have asked her to play it for me, but I knew she'd get cocky about. She swears I'm jealous that he's her celebrity, and I am, kinda, but she doesn't know that. _

_I type About A Girl in her music library and get two results. One of them is the actual song, but the other, I'm not sure what it is._

_"Why did you run?" I watch as door hits the wall and then bounces off._

_Her eyes land on me, and then on my hands which are holding her Ipod. She walks towards me and takes it out of my hands and places it on her nightstand next to me. I look at the screen and see About A Girl and then several songs under it, but the screen shuts off before I can identify what it actually says._

_I sigh and look up at her, I don't say anything, I just pat the spot next to me. She throws herself on the bed, causing me to slightly jump up, she lands next to me and taps my nose._

_"When are you gonna tell me what's bothering you? Did I do something wrong?" Yeah, you made me fall for you._

_"I'm just tired, of everything I guess. I don't know, I just wanna skip life for a few days."_

_She grabbed my hand and started tracing circles on the palm of my hand. I didn't expect her to speak up because I didn't even know what to say. It's not like I lied to her, I'm just hiding the truth._

_"Well we have the weekend to be bums. Why don't we just stay in bed for the rest of the day and cuddle while we pig out and watch lame t.v shows?"_

* * *

_We spent all day doing just that, and I didn't mind. I pushed my thoughts away and tried to enjoy this moment. I held her in my arms all day, the only times I didn't is when she got up to get more food._

_She knew something was bothering me, but she didn't bring it up again. I'm glad she didn't because I still need more time to think._

_I've been thinking a lot about her Ipod though, what's on there that I can't see?_

_"Demi?"_

_"Hmm?"_

_"Your Ipod, um I'm sorry about that. But can I ask you something?"_

_"Yeah Sel, what's up?" She turned to face me and I got goosebumps when she nuzzled her face into my chest._

_"About A Girl. I think, um. What is it?"_

_She got out of my grip and sat up. She started picking at her nails, but here eyes didn't meet mine._

_"I-it's, um i-it's just a playlist. Yeah, um it's a playlist with songs from, song from The Academy Is. W-why?" I watched her as she struggled to properly speak, which caught me off guard._

_What is she so nervous about? I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to what she's saying._

_"But why is it titled About A Girl? Is it about someone? Someone you like?"_

_"C-can we just watch t.v?"_

* * *

I didn't ask her anything else, but that doesn't mean I didn't think about it. Now that I look back at it that playlist was obviously about someone, and it was definitely about some girl she liked. But who did Demi like? I don't even know when Demi came to terms with her sexuality. I don't even know when I came to terms with my sexuality.

I don't think I even care, I just know Demi's the only person I actually want. But has she ever wanted me the way I want her? What if that playlist was about me? What if she liked me but was denying her love for me, just like the song? Ha ha, no.

"Selena!" I hear my mom yell out my name, but I don't move.

"What?" Silence.

"Mom, what?!" I speak up again, but there's more silence, now I have no choice but to get out of bed.

I run down the stairs pouting. I was so comfortable, I hate when she does this to me. If she screamed out my name why couldn't she just scream out what she needed to tell me?

"Yea- whoa. Um hi?" I looked at my mom, silently asking her why Demi's sitting on the couch.

"H-hey Sel." She got up and smiled at me. I walked towards and smiled back, I pulled her into me and wrapped my arms around her neck.

"I missed you." I pecked her cheek and rested my head on her shoulder as I felt her wrap her arms around my waist.

"I-I missed you too." She stuttered again, which caught my attention. Demi usually doesn't stutter, unless she's nervous, but she has nothing to be nervous about, she's comfortable with my mom.

"Ahem." I hear my mom clear her throat and we immediately pull away from each other.

"Ugh kids. Anyways, I asked Demi to come over and help you sort out the boxes we have in what's going to be the nursery room."

"You? As in me? Mom why?" I whined and threw myself on the couch. I was supposed to stay in bed all day, not take things out of boxes with the girl I'm supposed to be staying away from.

"Selena go." My mom pointed at the stairs and I sighed. I didn't wanna get her mad, I know it's bad for the baby so I sighed and started walking towards the stairs.

"You too Demi." Demi laughed at my mom and walked behind me.

"The hormones are definitely kicking in huh?" I laugh at her question and shake my head.

"Ugh, you have no idea."

"I heard that." My mom yells from down stairs and we speed up. We really don't need my pregnant mother yelling at us.

* * *

A lot of the boxes were actually things for the baby so we put them in the closet. Some boxes belonged to me, I didn't remember having majority of those things but Demi enjoyed looking at them.

We haven't talked much, and whenever we do it's about what's in the box, we haven't talked about anything personal. How would I even bring it up? What do I say? I don't even know what I wanna say to her.

I mean we did talk, but it was about a jacket, which was found in one of the boxes, so it's not like we made any progress. But she is keeping it, I guess that counts for something, right?

It's a light jean jacket from my clothing line, I didn't even know I had it, just like a majority of the other stuff we found. I didn't want it, it's kinda old, but she liked it and said she'd hate to see it go to waste, so I let her have it.

"I didn't know you wrote." I looked up once I heard her voice. I'm on the other side of the room so I turned around to see what she's talking about.

"What?"

"Songs. I knew you wrote poems and stuff, but I didn't know you wrote actual songs." I walk over to her and see a red and black notebook in her hand, I immediately recognize what it is. It's my songbook, I started writing in there because of her, hence the red and black since those are her favorite colors. And now that same notebook is in her hands. Fuck.

"Um yeah. I'll take that, I mean there's no point of keeping it in there. It's really, really old, I didn't even remember I had it, so let me take care of it." I was practically rambling, and I know she noticed because of the look she had on her face.

She's either going to read it, or tease me about it. I tried reaching for it, but slipped and landed on her lap. I felt my cheeks get warm, this is a really awkward position to be in.

I quickly rearranged myself so the back of my head was resting on her lap. I felt one of her hands beginning to stroke my hair. This feel so nice. Everything about this moment feels nice. I look up at her and smile, what she says next makes me want to take back what I was just thinking about this moment being nice.

"Are you really that desperate that you're willing to go down on me for this notebook? I never thought you had it in you Gomez." Yup, she embarrassed me, why am I not surprised? Her jokes haven't gotten a lot more sexual than usual.

"Demi, shut up." She looked down at me and smiled as she moved a strand of hair to the side of face.

I immediately noticed her Stay tattoo on her left wrist, and I felt bad about the scars. I admire her for everything she's been through. I reach for her arm and trace the thin white lines on her wrist. She doesn't say anything, but I do.

"Demi, I love you. You're my best friend. I just want you to know, that even after all these years, after everything we've been through, you will always mean the world to me, and I will always, always love you." You're the love of my life.

Obviously I don't say the last part to her, but I wish I could. I've never been so sure about what I want in life, I always have second thoughts on almost everything, but with her it's different. I spent so much time denying what I feel for her, but every time I tried ignoring my feelings towards Demi I would come up with the same conclusion each time, but I'm finally ok with it. I'm in love with my best friend, I'm in love with Demi.

* * *

**Manhattanpizza: I dislike Jelena with a passion, like eugh.**

**LovezObsessed: Lol yup, they're really stubborn. I'm pretty sure that's why they aren't as close anymore, they're stubborness gets in the way of them being able to properly fx whatever happened between them.**

**VeehxD: Haha yeah, but both of them will get their shit together, kinda.**

**Demenaforver13: Yes I completely agree. Demi is an idiot.**

**Suefanficlover: Ugh yes Dilmer is just no.**

**Thanks for reviewing(:**


	10. Chapter 10

**Sooo I thought I'd go ahead and post this since it's already done. I'm currently working on the next chapter which will be in Demi's pov, since we only know what Selena's been thinking. **

**You guys remember Voldemort? The codename given to Selena's crush? Well yeah that niggah is in here(:**

**I really like this chapter, but not really. I hope you guys enjoy it(:**

* * *

**Selena's Pov**

"Selena, I love you." I sat up once she said it.

She caught my attention, it wasn't just the words, it was the tone and the lack of words. I made sure to get my point across that she's my best friend, I didn't want to hint that I love her more than that. But she doesn't, she flat out says I love you, and she seems surprised at the words that just left her mouth.

"I'm sorry Selena, for everything." I take her hand in mine and start playing with her fingers, but I don't take my eyes off of hers, I'm really interested in what she's saying.

"I was stupid, immature, and all that other stuff, but most importantly I let things get in the way of our friendship. I wanna start over, and I know this isn't the first time I've said this, but there's a lot more to it. I just wanna tell you everything, I wanna get it over with. I know this is from the past, but I never really let go, with you I don't wanna let go of the past, I wanna remember all the little things we did together.

We drifted apart, and you could say that was a mutual thing because both of us gave up at some point, but we wouldn't have drifted off as much if it weren't for me.

It's obvious I wasn't in a good place back then, and everyone knows I wasn't making the best choices, but there's a reason I made them, it was because of you. I'm not blaming you for anything, well kinda. The only thing you're to blame for is the reason I'm still here.

I was out partying and hooking up with people because I was trying to find in them what I had found with you, and it didn't work. It only helped me stay in the darkness of depression. Those were very hard times because I didn't have you there, I didn't have my best friend there.

I never meant to push you away, I basically pushed you into Taylor's arms, and whenever I'd think about that it would kill me. I was so jealous at that time, I didn't wanna share you with anyone, I wanted you all to myself, I still do.

You've done so much for me, you've changed me for the better. I just wanna thank you, for being there for me, for tolerating all my bullshit over the years. And I love you." I just stared at her in awe.

I didn't once look away, I just sat next to her and tried to process everything she had just said to me. It's a lot to take in, and I don't get where all of this is coming from. I'm happy she's being so open with me, even though I didn't ask her to be. I'm just curious as to where all of this came from.

"Demi are you okay?"

"I don't really know anymore. I just wanted you to know that. But there's still one more thing I want you to get clear. I don't even know if this is the right time for it, but for us nothing has ever worked the way we wanted it to. I feel like I've waited way too long for this, but I want you to know, you deserve to know.

I didn't think I'd tell you today, so um I'm sorry if it's stupid but I thought I'd just wing it." She chuckles a bit which causes me to smile.

All my attention is focused on her, all that matters in this moment is her and what's she gonna tell me. She intertwines our fingers together and that's when I finally break the eye contact.

I had already grabbed her hand the moment she said she loved me, but I didn't pay much attention to it. But once our fingers locked together, I felt something cold press into my finger, and I just felt everything stop in that moment.

I looked down at her fingers and then looked back up, I was hoping she would notice, and silently realize what I'm trying to say, but she doesn't. She takes in a deep breath and smiles at me, she's completely oblivious to everything that's going on in my head.

"I'm in love with y-"

"Are you engaged?" I interrupted her. I had to.

"W-what?"

"Don't play stupid. What is this? How long have you had it? Why didn't you say anything to me? Gosh I'm an idiot." I get up and start walking around the room.

What the hell just happened? She's fucking engaged, the love of my life is fucking engaged. And for some reason I thought I could have a chance with her, but no. Nothing works out the way I want it to be. Why? This isn't fair, this isn't fair.

I stop walking and let my back hit the wall. I start sobbing as I slid down the wall and hug my knees, I can't hold it in, I don't even care that she's still here, I just let the tears roll down my face and the small screams escape my lips. I'm a total mess, and I just don't even care right now.

How did this even happen? Nothing makes sense when it comes to us. I mean she kissed my like two months ago, and then like a week later she tells me that it meant nothing to her, only to apologize a couple weeks after that. And now she's here, and she pretty much told me she's in love with me, but she's engaged? What the hell? She can't do that to me.

She can't just come back to me like this and tell me she's in love while wearing a fucking ring on her ring finger. She can't do this to me. This isn't fair.

"Selena?"

"W-what?" I can barely talk, my breathing is uneven and all I wanna do is scream.

"I-I don't know. I just I don't know. I don't wanna see you like this." It's your fucking fault I'm like this right now.

No, I can't blame it on her, it's my fault. If I would have told her how I felt things would have been different, I wouldn't be in this position right now.

I flip her the bird, I don't feel like talking to her, I can barely talk as it is, I feel a huge lump in my throat. She's not making it any better by getting closer to me, but again I don't say anything I just watch her. My eyes watch her hands, I can't stop staring at her ring. I'm so broken right now.

"Sel, you're gonna be okay." She places her hands and my knee and gently squeezes it causing me to look up.

Her eyes meet mine, she looks like she's about to cry any minute, but I know she's trying to stay strong. Typical us, even after years it's still the same thing. It was odd for us to cry together, usually one of us was vulnerable while the other held it together. I guess this time she's my rock.

"Girls? What happened?" My mom comes in and looks at us, I can tell she's worried, but I can't speak up, so Demi does it for me.

"I'm sure Selena will tell you later. We're fine, I think."

"Um, alright. Well I made lunch, just thought I should let you know." I looked up at my mom as she spoke. I know she was worried, but she shouldn't be. It's just a broken heart, it'll heal. Right?

* * *

Demi had been cracking jokes and having small talk with my mom, just like always, I on the other hand was lost in my own world.

I still haven't said anything yet, there's really nothing to say. I've decided to just let my thoughts consume me until Demi and I are left alone to speak again. I'm gonna try to be mature about it when the time comes. I'm gonna tell her that I'm happy for her. Because I am, I'm happy she's found love, even if it isn't with me.

"So Demi, any new love interests?" I glare at my mom from the other side of the table, but she doesn't take notice since she's biting into her sandwich.

Demi looks at me and gives me a small smile and a wink. I try to not roll my eyes, but I end up blushing instead.

"Actually, there's someone that's caught m-."

"Why don't you tell her that you're engaged huh?" In interrupt her again, and she's completely shocked by my outburst.

"Demi you're engaged? That's wonderful." My mom speaks up and smiles at Demi. Demi smiles back but then shakes her head.

"No, Mandy I'm not engaged. And Selena would know that if she let me finish instead of drawing up her own conclusions." She turns to face me and I can see the sadness in her eyes, they're glassy, she's most likely close to tears. She speaks up again, but directs it at me.

"So no Selena, I'm not engaged. But of course you didn't let me finish, you came to your own conclusion that hurt both of us."

"Excuse me Mandy." Demi smiles at my mom, and she nods in return. I watch as Demi leaves the kitchen and walks back up stairs. I was expecting her to leave, but I'm glad she didn't.

"I'll get the plates for you." I scoot the chair back so I can get up. I start walking around the table and start picking up the plates. My mom continues eating, I'm surprised she hasn't said anything yet, but I'm sure I'll get an earful later on.

I walk back to the sink and turn on the water. Usually I'd just use the dishwasher, but I need some time with my thoughts before I go up there and face Demi. I'm not sure what I'm thinking right now.

She's not engaged? I didn't give her a chance to respond, but she never denied it, she didn't even bring it up again. But that ring means something, she's not wearing it just to wear it. I guess I could have let her explain herself, maybe I just overreacted and we can be together and ha ha no. This isn't some fairytale, there is no happy ending.

* * *

"You're something else Gomez." I close the door behind me and sit down next to her.

"I don't know if you're gonna talk to me or not, but I'm still gonna talk either way.

I read some of your stuff, and I'm really surprised at everything that's in here. Out of all the songs, I Promise You is probably my favorite. I've written some songs about you as well, Heart Attack is actually about you."

Great she read my things from my songbook. I wanna be mad, but I can't. I was lucky enough to get I Promise You released, I went through hell to try to get the record company to approve.

I hoped Heart Attack would be about me, but I thought it wouldn't be. I'd assume it'd be about Wilmer, but I'm happy it's about me.

"I was scared of everything that had been happening. Things were changing way too fast and I felt like I had no control over it, and that only caused me to panic.

I've known for years what I feel for you, but even then I couldn't exactly admit it. And when I finally did, I decided to ignore it, which is why we became so distant.

I thought you would never feel that way about me, I was terrified of ruining what we already had so I kept to myself. But I was wrong, because you like me back, and it makes me wish I would have taken a chance with you when we were younger. Like I said before, things never work out the way we want them to when it comes to us. Ever since we became friends our relationship has been full of surprises, and I guess that's what makes it so special and unique because in the end we always come back to each other." I let my hand fall on her thigh and I gently rub it to comfort her.

She reaches for my hand and locks our fingers together. I don't smile, as much as I want to I can't because I can still feel that ring on her finger. She tugs my hand to get my attention, my eyes meet hers and then she sighs. There's obviously more to tell.

"I just, I don't even know if this is making any sense, gosh I'm stupid. This sounded a lot better in my head, but I just wanted to be completely honest with you, there's no holding back anymore.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love you Selena. I'm in love with you, and I'm so very very sorry about everything that I've done to you."

I don't say anything to her, I just stare at her as I try to process everything she just said. She loves me, she's in love with me, and she's sorry for everything. The love of my life just confessed her love for me, why am I not happy?

I mean I already knew since she said it before, but I cut her off, even though I didn't let her finish I knew what she was getting at. I was too focused on the ring at that moment, but she's not engaged, but either way she's in a relationship. I guess that's why I'm not happy about it, I know she can't be mine.

I'm in too much shock to say anything. What do I say? Should I tell her I love her as well, or do I continue to keep everything to myself? She already knows I like her, she read my old songbook, but there's a difference in actually saying it and reading it.

She said so herself, when it comes to us things never work out the way we want them to. She took the risk, so why can't I? I'm already used to feeling pain when it comes to our relationship.

"Demi." I whisper her name and gently tug her hand. I lift my head up and our eyes meet, here goes nothing.

"I-I love you too Voldemort." She looked at me confused and then burst out laughing. I couldn't help but blush at how stupid I could be, but that's all I am when I'm with her.

She turned her body around so it was facing me, but I stared at the ground. I'm still blushing and trying to get over how stupid that just sounded.

"So I'm your forbidden love? I'm that person you were falling so hard for? I'm your Voldemort?" Her smile has never been so contagious until right now.

"Yeah. That's you." I started leaning in, once I was close enough I cupped the side of her face. I watched as my hand gently trembled against her cheek. This is the first time I'm actually kissing her.

My lips gently brushed up against hers, I felt her smile and she pushed our lips together. I wanted to laugh but I decided against it.

The moment our lips actually locked, I lost it. People say they feel sparks, like fireworks when they kiss, but that is nowhere near as close as to what I'm feeling right now. I'm not feeling anything, but I feel everything all at once.

I've never had such an amazing kiss, everything about this is perfect. The way our lips fit together, the way the slowly move against each others, it's perfect. I can feel my stomach doing flips, a field of butterflies are in my stomach, my heart is beating a mile a minute, and my mind is racing.

I pull back, but only because I was curious to her reaction. Her eyes slowly fluttered open and I felt like I was staring at an angel.

"I can't believe I ever denied how I felt for you, I can't believe I kept it hidden for so long.

You're such an amazing person, and I love you so so much. I'm sorry I feel like I'm babbling, but I don't wanna stop telling you how much I love. I'm just happy that I can finally say it, and you feel the same way, and I haven't been this happy in a while Can you kiss me again? Or can I kiss you? I'm a mess ri-."

"Demi shut up, just kiss me." She pulled me into her and kissed me, just like I told her to. Both of us were smiling into the kiss, this made it even better, as if that were possible. With just one kiss she has me so hypnotized.

I pulled away again and pecked her nose. I hate having to pull away, but we can't be doing this and that kills me, there's still so much we need to figure out.

"W-what's wrong?" She looked at me with sad eyes and I immediately felt guilty.

"Nothing. I just, what's next? I love you Demi, and we can't even be together." I didn't want to be a buzz kill, but we don't even know what's gonna happen next. We just got ourselves into something without thinking about the outcome.

"Are you with Justin?" I could hear how disgusted she was by having to say his name, I shook my head and laughed.

"No, but you're with Wilmer right?" I knew they were together, but I still asked.

"Y-yeah."

"He gave you that ring, right?" She nodded and sighed.

"We can't do this to him, you can't do this to him. You guys love each other, and I'm not getting in the way of that."

"I'll break up with him."

"I can't ask you to do that for me. There's a reason you went back to him instead of coming to me, maybe you guys are meant to be."

"What?! Are you serious Selena? You can't say that after watch just happened, we're obviously meant to be." She raised her voice at me and caused me to jump a bit.

"But maybe now isn't our time."

"Selena, no. I can't, please?" I saw how her eyes were beginning to tear up, I took in a shaky breath and blinked. I hated seeing her like this, but I have to stay strong.

"I'm just telling you the truth Demi. Have you ever thought why you went back to Wilmer?"

"Yeah, but I don't know. I never really got over him, but you're always the one I wanted, you will always be the one I want, the one I need."

"I've waited years for this, for us, but I'll continue to wait." I pecked her cheek and wiped a tear that was rolling down her face.

"I'm sorry." Her voice was barely audible, it sounded like she wasn't even talking because of how bad she started crying, but I still heard her, and it broke my heart.

Of course I always find a way to fuck things up between us. Why can't we just be happy together? Why can't I just call her mine and be with her everyday? Why can't things ever be simple? Maybe I could just pretend, at least for now.

* * *

**I'll answe reviews in the next chapter(:**


	11. Chapter 11

**Lol thanks for the reviews. My emotions are all over the place with everything that's happened. Next chapter will be a bit sappy, but Selena and Demi will be all cute and stuff.**

**Sorry if there are any mistakes but I just wanted to upload this chapter because I didn't wanna leave you guys hanging. **

**This is everything that happened but it's all in Demi's pov. Enjoy(:**

* * *

**Demi's Pov **

I admit I was a bit scared when I saw that Mandy had called me, I thought something had happened to Selena, but she only wanted me to come over to help her with the nursery for the baby.

I had no problem with helping her, she had mentioned it to me before and I had already agreed, I couldn't exactly say no to her. Mandy is basically like a second mom to me. And this is an opportunity to see Selena so I didn't even give it a second thought, I knew I had to go see her.

Three weeks without seeing or talking to her has been absolute hell. I've been dreaming and thinking about her nonstop. No matter how the dream went I always woke up crying. I thought that it was happening because it was something that had happened recently, i thought it would go away a couple days later, I assumed it was just my conscience, but it's more than that, it was my heart speaking to me as well.

Being away from her was affecting me a lot more than I thought it would. I knew I would miss her, I always miss her even if we had spent all day together, but this time it was different because I didn't know I would see her again.

I panicked the moment I had to knock on the door. I was a nervous wreck, and I still kind of am because I haven't seen Selena yet. Mandy let me in a little while ago, she was doing something so she told me to take a seat.

"Demi is everything okay?" I slightly jumped when I heard Mandy's voice, I wonder how long she's been standing there.

"I guess. I'm just really nervous about seeing her." She smiled at me and shook her head.

"She doesn't even know I called you. I know both of you miss each other, and I'm also aware of how stubborn both of you can be."

"Do you think she'll be happy to see me?" I was curious, I don't know if Selena actually wanted to see me or not.

"Selena!" Mandy screams and I hear Selena yell back. She seems annoyed, I hope she isn't in a bad mood.

I heard her footsteps get louder, the louder and closer they got, the more I began to panic. Just breathe and you'll be fine.

I watch as she walks directly to her mom, I notice she's pouting and it actually helped me calm my nerves, which is weird because my heart is beating incredibly fast right now.

"Yea- whoa. Um hi?" She was surprised to see me, it was obvious. Well her mom didn't even tell her I'd be here so it makes sense. This feels really awkward, I knew I had to say something, I can't just sit on her couch and not do anything.

"H-hey Sel." I got up and smiled at her. I wasn't sure what to do so I kind of just stood there.

She walked towards me and smiled back, she pulled me into her and wrapped her arms around my neck.

"I missed you." She said and pecked my cheek, she then rested her head on my shoulder as I wrapped my arms around her waist.

I was kind of shocked to everything that was happening so it took me a while to actually respond to what was happening.

"I-I missed you too." I spoke up, but ended up stuttering. What the hell? That's the second time and I've barely said ten words to her.

"Ahem." Mandy clears her throat and we immediately pull away from each other.

"Ugh kids. Anyways, I asked Demi to come over and help you sort out the boxes we have in what's going to be the nursery room." I look down at the floor as Mandy talks to Selena.

"You? As in me? Mom why?" Selena whined and threw herself on the couch. I had to hold back a laugh at how cute she looked like this.

"Selena go." Her mom pointed at the stairs and she started walking towards them

"You too Demi." I laughed at Mandy, I didn't mean too, but it's strange seeing her like this, Mandy is the easy going mom, she's was always on our side when Selena and I were younger and now she's bossing me around.

"The hormones are definitely kicking in huh?" I ask Selena, trying to make conversation as we go up the stairs. She laughs at me and then replies.

"Ugh, you have no idea."

"I heard that." Mandy yells from down stairs, I didn't think she'd hear us.

* * *

They sure had a lot of boxes, but I didn't mind being here, as long as I get to be with my baby, I mean Selena. Even though I'm with her, it feels like I'm not. We're on separate sides of the room going through boxes and we've barely spoken.

The only thing we talked about was a jacket I found in one of the boxes, she didn't want it so I asked her for it. I still have some of her clothes at home, I obviously don't fit into them, but I still kept them. She has this one hoodie she used to always wear to sleep because it kept her warm and comfortable since it was huge, I occasionally use it to go to sleep, but she doesn't need to know that.

The things I've found so far are interesting, some of them were pictures, or drawings she had from over the years. A lot of the things are hers, I wonder what she got stuck with.

I'm almost done with this box, the last thing in here a red and black notebook. The inside cover was covered with music notes and hearts. I didn't think she still had this notebook, she was always so secrative about it, and now it's finally in my hands, muahaha.

"I didn't know you wrote." I flipped through more pages, some of them were titled and others weren't.

"What?"

"Songs. I knew you wrote poems and stuff, but I didn't know you wrote actual songs."

"Um yeah. Ill take that, I mean there's no point of keeping it in there. It's really, really old, I didn't even remember I had it, so let me take care of it." She's speaking incredibly fast, I barely understood what she was trying to say, but I do know that she doesn't want me to read what's in here, which only makes me wanna read it even more.

I always thought I was the clumsy one when it came to us, but she just proved me wrong. I don't how she managed to fall trying to get her notebook, but she did, and she fell in an awkward position. Her face landed on my lap and I wanted to burst out laughing the moment it happened. Both of us were blushing, but I know for a fact that she's a lot more embarrassed than I am.

She moved around so the back of her head was laying on my thighs. I couldn't help myself and I started stroking her hair.

"Are you really that desperate that you're willing to go down on me for this notebook? I never thought you had it in you Gomez."

"Demi, shut up." She smiled at me, and I found myself smiling back. I moved a strand of hair to the side of her face and just stared at her.

I wasn't creepily staring at her, more like admiring her, just like she's admiring my wrist right now. She reached for my arm and traced the thin white lines. I still haven't said anything, I don't know what to say.

I'm curious about what goes through her head whenever she sees them. Does she feel disgusted, embarrassed that I even did that to myself?

"Demi, I love you. You're my best friend. I just want you to know, that even after all these years, after everything we've been through, you will always mean the world to me, and I will always, always love you."

We stared at each other as she spoke, I was very interested in what she was saying, but I didn't like what she said.

_"You're my best friend."_

As if I don't already know that, I don't need to be reminded that we're just friends. I don't wanna be just friends anymore, I'm done with being nothing more than friends. I want her to be mine, I need her to be mine.

"Selena, I love you." She sat up once I said and looked at me in confusion.

I'm pretty sure I could guess what it is that she's thinking right now. She's probably just as confused as I am. I didn't think I'd be saying that to her, at least not like that. It's not something I was expecting myself to say, but it's true. I might as well just tell her everything, I think I'm ready to properly open up to her.

"I'm sorry Selena, for everything." I want to say more, but I feel extremely nervous right now. She takes my hand in attempt to comfort and it works.

"I was stupid, immature, and all that other stuff, but most importantly I let things get in the way of our friendship. I wanna start over, and I know this isn't the first time I've said this, but there's a lot more to it. I just wanna tell you everything, I wanna get it over with. I know this is from the past, but I never really let go, with you I don't wanna let go of the past, I wanna remember all the little things we did together.

We drifted apart, and you could say that was a mutual thing because both of us gave up at some point, but we wouldn't have drifted off as much if it weren't for me.

It's obvious I wasn't in a good place back then, and everyone knows I wasn't making the best choices, but there's a reason I made them, it was because of you. I'm not blaming you for anything, well kinda. The only thing you're to blame for is the reason I'm still here.

I was out partying and hooking up with people because I was trying to find in them what I had found with you, and it didn't work. It only helped me stay in the darkness of depression. Those were very hard times because I didn't have you there, I didn't have my best friend there.

I never meant to push you away, I basically pushed you into Taylor's arms, and whenever I'd think about that it would kill me. I was so jealous at that time, I didn't wanna share you with anyone, I wanted you all to myself, I still do.

You've done so much for me, you've changed me for the better. I just wanna thank you, for being there for me, for tolerating all my bullshit over the years. And I love you."

I feel so empty in this moment. I feel naked, vulnerable, I want to cry. I don't regret it, not one bit, but I completely took down my walls for her.

"Demi are you okay?"

"I don't really know anymore. I just wanted you to know that. But there's still one more thing I want you to get clear. I don't even know if this is the right time for it, but for us nothing has ever worked the way we wanted it to. I feel like I've waited way too long for this, but I want you to know, you deserve to know.

I didn't think I'd tell you today, so um I'm sorry if it's stupid but I thought I'd just wing it." I honestly didn't think this would be happening today, but it's something that needs to be done.

Maybe now isn't even the right time, but to me it feels right. Everything about this moment just feels right. I take in a deep breath and smiles at her.

"I'm in love with y-"

"Are you engaged?" She cut me off, I was so confused at what she had just asked me.

"W-what?"

"Don't play stupid. What is this? How long have you had it? Why didn't you say anything to me? Gosh I'm an idiot."

I watch her leave my side as she starts walking around the room.

What the hell just happened? One minute I'm trying to tell her I'm in love with her, and the next she's sobbing as she hugs her knees. How did I manage to fuck things up this bad?

She asked me a question, but did I hear her right? She thinks I'm engaged, but why would she think that?

She starts sobbing even more and hurts me. I feel her pain and I don't even know how I caused it. I left myself off the floor and walk in her direction. I realize what she's talking about when I brush my fingers through my hair. It's the ring Wilmer gave me.

"Selena?"

"W-what?"

"I-I don't know. I just I don't know. I don't wanna see you like this." I didn't know what to say, I've been her rock multiple times, but I've never been the one to cause her pain. I've never had to pick up the pieces for something I did.

She flips me off. I wanna laugh because of how childish she seems, but I know it's wrong because she's hurting. The smalls cries that leave her lips are more than enough to show her pain, I can't believe I fucked up, but she didn't even give me a chance to explain, she came to her own conclusion.

"Sel, you're gonna be okay." I gently squeeze her knee and she looks up at me.

Tears are still rolling down her face, she's taking shaky breath from her mouth. Seeing her like this is enough to break me, but I have to stay strong for her. What good is it gonna do if I start crying with her?

"Girls? What happened?" Mandy comes in and stares at both of us, her eyes go back to Selena.

"I'm sure Selena will tell you later. We're fine, I think." I speak up for her because I know she can't.

"Um, alright. Well I made lunch, just thought I should let you know."

Selena hadn't said a word since we came downstairs, and Mandy and I didn't push her into saying anything. We didn't exactly ignore her, but she was in her own little world, so I carried out a conversation with Mandy.

"So Demi, any new love interests?" I look at Selena and smile at her, I make sure to wink because I know it'll make her blush.

"Actually, there's someone that's caught m-."

"Why don't you tell her that you're engaged huh?" She unexpectedly cut me off, again.

"Demi you're engaged? That's wonderful." I could tell Mandy was just being polite.

"No, Mandy I'm not engaged. And Selena would know that if she let me finish instead of drawing up her own conclusions." I turn to face her. Out of all the things she could say she decides to say that, which isn't even true.

"So no Selena, I'm not engaged. But of course you didn't let me finish, you came to your own conclusion that hurt both of us." I faced her as I spoke, because this time I wasn't talking to Mandy, I was talking to Selena because she can't just assume something like that.

"Excuse me Mandy." I smile at Mandy and excuse myself from the table. There's really no reason for me to stay there anymore, so I just go upstairs.

* * *

I didn't know if Selena would stay down there or come back up, so I decided to keep myself busy. I decided to go through her songbook. It's just something I had to do, the temptation was there, and I didn't even bother to fight it. I needed to know what was in there.

Almost every page had four quarter notes at the top of page with a little heart next to it. It's interesting to look at because this is her stuff from when she was younger. She was just another Disney princess, now she's more than that.

Everything in here is just, weird? I don't think that's the proper way to describe it, it's just that I never knew Selena had these feelings towards someone. l mean yeah she had her crushes on guys, and I would have to listen to her, but still, those crushes have nothing on this mystery person.

Everything is new to me, except this one page, l recognize the lyrics, it's actually one of her songs that she released. It's always been one of my favorites.

Again, there's four quarter notes at the top of the page with a heart next to it, as well as the title. There's a star in the top right hand corner and right next to it it says back page. Me being the nosy curious person that l am, l flip to the back page.

It's different from the rest. The other entries were songs, this is anything but a song. She's explaining the reason for l Promise You.

_'You're driving me insane, and writing about you is the only way to keep me sane. This song means a lot to me because I actually wrote it, I went through hell to get it released because they found out it was about you. They couldn't do anything to you since you knew nothing about this, the risk was worth it._

_You make me feel like no one else ever has, you have no idea of the affect you have on me. Sometimes I get scared that you might figure me out, and that it could end things between us. But I feel like that's a risk I wouldn't mind taking, because if you find out, it could work out for the best._

_l secretly hope that once you hear it you'll relate it to us. Because I promise you that l will always love you Demi, no matter what happens, l will always love you because I know we'll make it.'_

To say I'm shocked is a complete understatement, like how am I even breathing?

I hear the door open, it doesn't give me enough time to freak out. I know I have a face eating smile right now, but how can I not?

Selena liked me, she even wrote songs about me, and one of them got released. If she liked me then, what are the chances of her liking me now? I could always find out.

"You're something else Gomez." She sits next to me, but she doesn't say anything, which doesn't surprise me. I guess I'll have to do all the talking, I don't mind though because it gives me a chance to be honest and clear things up.

"I don't know if you're gonna talk to me or not, but I'm still gonna talk either way.

I read some of your stuff, and I'm really surprised at everything that's in here. Out of all the songs, I Promise You is probably my favorite. I've written some songs about you as well, Heart Attack is actually about you." Heart Attack isn't the only song about her, but she doesn't need to know, at least right now.

"I was scared of everything that had been happening. Things were changing way too fast and I felt like I had no control over it, and that only caused me to panic.

I've known for years what I feel for you, but even then I couldn't exactly admit it. And when I finally did, I decided to ignore it, which is why we became so distant.

I thought you would never feel that way about me, I was terrified of ruining what we already had so I kept to myself. But I was wrong, because you like me back, and it makes me wish I would have taken a chance with you when we were younger. Like I said before, things never work out the way we want them to when it comes to us. Ever since we became friends our relationship has been full of surprises, and I guess that's what makes it so special and unique because in the end we always come back to each other." She doesn't say anything, but she squeezes my thigh trying to comfort me.

I grab her hand and lock our fingers together, I can't help but notice the look of disappointment on her face. I tug her hand a bit to get her attention, I don't wanna see her like this.

She looks at me and I look back at her. It's there, it's obviously there, she's so hurt by all of this. I'm not even engaged, but she still looks like shit. I have to keep talking if I wanna get my point across.

"I just, I don't even know if this is making any sense, gosh I'm stupid. This sounded a lot better in my head, but I just wanted to be completely honest with you, there's no holding back anymore.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love you Selena. I'm in love with you, and I'm so very very sorry about everything that I've done to you."

She stares at me, her face isn't showing any emotion, it's all in her eyes. She's definitely surprised and so am I. She finally knows what I should have told her years ago.

I'm in love with her, and now she's aware of it.

"Demi." She whispers my name, her voice was so soft I barely heard it. I feel her tug on my hand and I instantly look up. Our eyes meet and she opens her mouth to speak.

"I-I love you too Voldemort." I didn't know what she was referring to, but then it hit me and I couldn't stop laughing.

I noticed her blushing, but even then I didn't bother to stop, I just couldn't because she's a such a dork, but she loves me, and that's really all that matters.

Out of all people I didn't expect me to be that person she liked so much. I remember being there for her when she would mention Voldemort, she would cry because she was frustrated. She always told me nothing could happen between them because they were just starting to fix their friendship, but I never thought she could be referring to us.

I turned my body around so I could properly face her. She wouldn't meet my eyes and she was still blushing, I couldn't help but smile.

"So I'm your forbidden love? I'm that person you were falling so hard for? I'm your Voldemort?" I smiled like an idiot once I realized what I just said. Both of us had matching smiles on our faces.

"Yeah. That's you." I saw her start to lean in and I became nervous.

I know what she's gonna do, and I can tell she's just as nervous because she cupped my cheek and her hand is shaking against it. Her lips gently brushed up against mine and I smiled again. I pushed our lips together and smiled even more. I don't know why that's become a habit of mine, but it seems to make a moment like this more special.

Our lips soon locked, and just wow. I was lucky enough to have kissed her before, but that was just a one sided kiss, this kiss is different. It's different than any kiss I've ever had, no other kiss has ever had this effect on me.

Her lips are so smooth and gentle, unlike any other pair. This just doesn't feel real, nothing that's happened today feels real to me. I feel like I'm living a dream right now.

She pulls back and I instantly miss her lips. It just the way our lips fit together, and how they moved in sync, like just wow. I can't even from proper thoughts anymore.

"I can't believe I ever denied how I felt for you, I can't believe I kept it hidden for so long.

You're such an amazing person, and I love you so so much. I'm sorry I feel like I'm babbling, but I don't wanna stop telling you how much I love. I'm just happy that I can finally say it, and you feel the same way, and I haven't been this happy in a while Can you kiss me again? Or can I kiss you? I'm a mess ri-."

"Demi shut up, just kiss me." I pulled her into me and kissed her.

I didn't mean to start rambling like that, but fuck her lips are so addictive. They're like some type of drug, I feel like I'm on this high and I don't want it to go to away.

She pulled away again and pecked my nose. Am I doing something wrong?

"W-what's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just, what's next? I love you Demi, and we can't even be together." What does she mean we can't be together? Of course we can be together, I think she's not dating Justin right now, I'm not even too sure.

"Are you with Justin?" I hated saying his name, and she noticed because she laughed as she shook her head at me.

"No, but you're with Wilmer right?"

"Y-yeah." Wilmer, I'm with Wilmer that's why we can't be together. How does she have all of this figured out?

"He gave you that ring, right?" I nodded and sighed

"We can't do this to him, you can't do this to him. You guys love each other, and I'm not getting in the way of that."

"I'll break up with him." I can't let her get away. I have to break up with Wilmer.

"I can't ask you to do that for me. There's a reason you went back to him instead of coming to me, maybe you guys are meant to be."

"What?! Are you serious Selena? You can't say that after what just happened, we're obviously meant to be." What the hell how can she even say something like this?

After what just happened she fucking say something like that? I didn't mean to raise my voice, but fuck!

"But maybe now isn't our time."

"Selena, no. I can't, please?" She isn't even officially mine and I'm begging her to stay.

"I'm just telling you the truth Demi. Have you ever thought why you went back to Wilmer?"

"Yeah, but I don't know. I never really got over him, but you're always the one I wanted, you will always be the one I want, the one I need."

"I've waited years for this, for us, but I'll continue to wait." She pecked my cheek and wiped a tear that was rolling down my face.

"I'm sorry." I knew she heard me, which surprised me because I barely even heard myself.

I sat next to her and cried, it's all I could do. I love her, like I actually love her and I can't be with her. I'm gonna have to break up with Wilmer, but I don't know how I'm gonna do it. I can't just break up with him that's the problem, our relationship isn't like any other relationship, but Selena isn't just some girl, she's the love of my life.

* * *

**Suefanficlover: I hope you enjoyed this, I didn't expect to be updating so soon.**

**VeehxD: Lol I'm sorry I made you cry xD. But the next chapter will be a bit sappy, but there's gonna be a lot of fluff(:**

**LovezObsessed: Lol yeah Justin and Wilmer are bitches. **

**Demenaforever13: Patience young grasshopper, they will be together soon, or not. MUAHAHAHAHA.**


	12. Chapter 12

**I rewrote this chapter like twice and I'm finally okayish with it lol. **

**Selena might perform on X Factor this week, it hasn't been confirmed, but I hope it's true because I need more Demena in my life.**

**I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, thanks for reading and reviewing, it really means a lot to me. **

**Enjoy(:**

* * *

**Demi's Pov**

"The last thing I wanna do is pressure you, I'm just curious is all. But if you were to break up with Wilmer, I'm not saying that you should, or that you need to, but if you did, when would it happen?"

I thought about what she said over and over but I don't know how to respond to that. I know that I have to break up with Wilmer, I need Selena in my life, I can't be away from her anymore, but how do I go about it?

I hate knowing that I'm gonna hurt Wilmer, I'm hurting him right now just by being with Selena. I don't get when my love life became so complicated, I'm not one to cheat, but in just a couple months I've cheated and it really disappoints me because I'm not like this, the old me was, but I'm not.

Wilmer has been nothing but nice and caring, I don't wanna hurt him, but there's really no other way. I'm happy with him and he's happy with me, we get along well, but he's not the one I truly want. I just wish I wouldn't have fucked up so badly, but everything that's happened so far is for a reason I guess.

"I don't know. I mean I have to break up with him that's for sure, but it's not easy. I have time to think about it though." I finally reply, and maybe it wasn't the right thing to say. It's nothing but the truth, but maybe I could have worded it differently.

Selena may not be pushing me to break up with Wilmer, but I know she wants me to. Now that I told her I have time to think about it, it probably doesn't make her too happy.

"What do you mean you have time to think about it?"

"Oh, um I'm going on tour. It's a couple of weeks I think? It's no more than month though." She sighed loudly and laced our fingers together.

"Okay. W-when are you leaving?"

"Tonight."

She didn't say anything, and neither did I. Our conversation kinda just ended right there. I don't know if she's mad, but there's really nothing I can do, I have to go on tour, and it's not too long. I've been gone longer and we've gotten through it.

"I have an idea, it's something stupid, and it's so wrong, and I'd never do anything like this, but when it comes to you I do the stupidest shit ever. So um, what if we just be like closer, since you're leaving and all, and you won't see Wilmer till you come back, maybe we could, you know?"

"Act like a couple?"

"Y-yeah. Thank God you understood because I'm pretty sure I wasn't making sense anymore. But like we don't have to, unless you want to, but it's cool if you don't. I-it's up to y-."

I didn't think this is something I'd be doing so soon, but I'm glad I was able to do it. I cut her rambling off with a kiss. It was the first thing that came to mind, she's so nervous about the idea she just proposed and there's really no reason for her to be.

I felt her smile against my lips and that made me feel even more happier. Her hands are on the sides of my face, she's becoming more confident, which is a good things because I don't want her to feel embarrassed around me.

I pull back and rest my forehead against her and watch as her eyes slowly flutter open. She smiles at me and rubs her nose against mine, this only makes me smile even more.

"So I take that as a yes?"

"Hmm, I'm not sure. There's this really cute girl that's totally obsessed with me, I wouldn't wanna make her jealous."

"Fuck you Demi." She shoved my shoulder and I rolled my eyes at her. Was that supposed to hurt me?

"Whoa, don't you think we're moving to fast? But hey if you wanna fuck me you can go ahead and do it." I love messing with her, she's just too cute.

"I'm done." She rolled her eyes and walked away from me.

I was left on the floor laughing like an idiot. It's cute to see her so frustrated, she hardly ever has any comebacks.

I hear her footsteps stop, she's standing at the door, but she's smiling at me.

"Bye." She waves and opens the door.

I jump up and run towards her before she has a chance to leave. Right when she was leaving the room I grabbed her by the waist and pulled her into me.

"I'm sorry I'll behave." I whispered into her ear and saw as she slightly shivered. She turned around to face me and I found myself getting lost in her eyes.

"I know you won't." She whispered against my lips and I felt myself getting nervous.

"I uhh."

"Dork." She laughed at the fact that I couldn't even speak. She's just too close to me and she isn't doing anything, she already makes me nervous and she's making it worse.

* * *

"Are you serious?"

"Y-yeah. I was on my way to get a popsicle and bam, I slipped and broke my leg."

"You're so, you're stupid. Did it hurt, like a lot?"

"Yeah, I didn't really cry, I kinda just sat there and laughed. Wilmer was the one panicking, he was pacing back and forth he had no clue what to do." I couldn't help but notice the look on her face when I mentioned Wilmer, she looks so disgusted, it's cute to see her get jealous.

"He had his phone in his hand but didn't know what to do, it wasn't till I stopped laughing that he actually called someone. I had to tell him to call my mom and even then he couldn't do it right.

I admit that wasn't one of my brightest moments, I haven't a popsicle ever since. But seeing Wilmer like that was so cute." I know I was pushing it, but she won't hold it against me, at least I think.

Selena is the jealous type, and so am I but it depends on the person. I have more control over it, she obviously doesn't because she's sitting on her bed next to me with her arms crossed and a pout on her lips.

"Is someone jealous?"

"N-no."

"I'll take that as a yes."

"Whatever."

"Can't you just accept the fact that you're jealous?"

"Why do I feel like we've done this before?"

"Because we have. You're always jealous and you never want to admit it." I poke her cheek and she smacks my hand away.

"I am not, you get jealous too." She accuses me but I'm hardly ever jealous.

That's a lie, but I never really show my jealousy, I keep it to myself. Or at least I try to.

"Name one time I've been jealous. I know for a fact that you've been jealous more times than I have."

"Wh-what? Pshh no. Alright, I got you. There was that one time when we were like 15 and we went to the store, the cashier was flirting with me.

You grabbed my hand and you were all over me, he ended up getting creeped out. Everytime we would go he would avoid us because he was scared that _my girlfriend_ would do something to him.

Also during some award show, I can't remember the name, but Justin was there and you pretty much shot daggers at him whenever you'd see him. He asked me if you were mad at him or something and I lied and said you had a bad day.

And last year when I was staying over at your place Justin wanted me to go over to his house, you didn't want me to go. You didn't even respond when I asked you if you wanted me to go or not, but you didn't have to because I knew how you felt about it.

And then the d-."

"Fine I get I get jealous too." I cut her off before she could continue. I didn't think she could come up with all those examples.

"No, this one's my favorite. When we went on a double date together, you told me to go fuck Justin in the bathroom. I tried so hard not to laugh that day, I knew something had been bothering you, and now it makes sense."

"Can you blame me? You're so pretty and gorgeous, and cute, and funny, and amazing, how can I not get jealous?"

"I love you." She leans in and captures my bottom lip. I feel her hand on my waist as she pulls me in closer. For someone that's never kissed a girl until today, she sure does know what to do.

I pull back and smile at her. I don't know how I ever lived without her kisses, and now I'm gonna have to survive a month without her.

"I love me too." I lean in peck her forehead but she shoves my shoulder once she realizes what I just said. She punches my arm and I let out a small scream.

I sit up and start rubbing my arm where here fist had just been. I can't believe she actually punched me, out of everything she could have done she chooses to punch me, and that actually hurt. She can pack a pretty mean punch.

"I'm sorry." She covered her mouth as she tried not to laugh. I shook my head at her and just shrugged it off.

"I know you're not, but since you're so cute I'll forgive you."

* * *

"Hey girls are you all done?" I looked at Selena, hoping she would respond because I had no idea what to say.

We didn't even finish sorting through the boxes. We had been in her room for a while and we got bored and hungry so we decided to come downstairs and get some food

"Demi?" Selena looks at me and pouts. I roll my eyes at her and sigh. I was hoping she would be the one to cover for us.

"Selena hit me!" I tell Mandy and she looks at me confused. Selena is shooting daggers at me from the other side of the kitchen.

"What?! Selena?" She turns to face Selena and I feel such a need to laugh.

Why is it that I want to laugh when I shouldn't laugh? I know I'm supposed to be mature, but I can't. I just snitched on Selena for hitting.

"W-what? Mom she's lying!" She accused me and winked at me.

"Mandy why would I lie to you?" Both Mandy and Selena rolled their eyes, they look a lot alike.

"Selena, just apologize to your girlfriend."

Mandy walked away laughing to herself, but we were left standing in the kitchen, confused to what had just occurred.

"Did she just call me your girlfriend? Does your mom know? Are we in trouble?" I'm panicking.

Am I in trouble? Did she hear us? What if she doesn't like me anymore?

"Um, y-yeah. Wow. Well you're not my girlfriend, at least not yet. Help me get some food." She walked past me and pecked my lips.

I watched her walk away and noticed her ass. At least now I don't have to be so secretive about it, I can look at my baby all I want.

"Dems stop staring." I laugh at her and start walking towards her.

"What do you want me to take?"

"This." She hands me three large bags of different chips and two boxes of cookies.

I have no choice but to press them against myself, otherwise everything would have fallen.

"Is that it?"

"Um, I think so?" She checks the pantry for anything else she might have missed.

I was being sarcastic, I didn't think she'd actually want more food. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if we end up coming back for more.

"I think we're good to go. Come on." She closes the closet door and walks past me.

I follow her out of the kitchen and up the stairs. I realize she made me carry everything, the only thing she has is a jar of pickles and a gallon of orange juice. But there's no use in saying anything.

"What movie are we gonna watch?" She sets everything on the table next to her bed and walks towards the tv in her room.

I place everything I have on the same table. Once I'm done I go to her bed and make myself comfortable.

"I don't know, it's up to you."

* * *

"Demi?"

"Demi."

I slowly opened my eyes and looked up, I saw the light of the tv but it took me a while to realize I was in Selena's bed.

"Shh." I shushed her and tightened my grip on her.

I'm not surprised we fell asleep, we does this every time we watch a movie. I don't even know when we fell asleep, but I'm happy that we did, because I got to wake up with her in my arms.

"Baby you have to get up. I don't want you to miss your flight."

"Fuck, my flight." I got out of her bed and slipped my shoes on. What the fuck am I supposed to do?

I don't have any clothes with me, it's late, I leave in two hours I don't have anything with me. Oh my fuck she called me baby.

"Did you call me baby?"

"Um I think I did." I watch as she sits up and scratches her head. Her eyes are barely open and her hair is messy, but she still looks so gorgeous.

"Yeah, I did." She smiles at me once she realizes that she actually did call me baby, I don't know why it causes me to blush.

"Demi remember you're leaving in two hours and you don't have any luggage. Are you gonna go back home or?"

I don't know what to do right now. I don't wanna go back home because Wilmer's gonna be there and I really don't wanna see him until I come back from tour, but how do I fly out without any clothing, or anything for that matter?

At this point I don't even wanna go anymore, I just wanna go back to bed and hold Selena, but I can't.

"Um I don't know what to do. I wanna enjoy as much time as possible with you, but I have to leave, and I don't wanna leave, and ugh this is so complicated."

"I'll walk you out." She gets out of her bed, I hear her sigh and it breaks my heart. I really don't wanna leave her.

Marissa is coming with me so maybe I can ask her to get my stuff for me? I hate that she'd have to go out of her way to do it, but I need to be with Selena.

"N-no. Um I'll ask Marissa to get my stuff for me." I walk towards her bed and reach for my phone.

_'It's late and your flight leaves soon. Um I don't know if I did anything wrong because we haven't really spoken all day. I figured you'd call or something, or that you'd be back home to pick up your stuff, but since you're not I asked Max to stop by so he has everything. I love you Demi, have a good flight, stay safe, and call when you can.'_

The moment I opened my phone his message opened up. I read it over and over, each time the guilt was there. I feel guilty for doing this, but it doesn't feel wrong, because being with Selena has never felt wrong.

"Max has my things so I don't have to worry about it."

"That's good.

So um I was thinking, would it be okay if I could like I don't know drive you to the airport? We could just chill in your car till it's time for you to actually be at the airport?"

* * *

**VeehxD: Lol I don't like making problems for them, but either way they get through it.**

**Suefanficlover: Aww thanks that means a lot. **

**Demenaforever13: I'm sorry but you're review had me dying lol.**

**LovezObsessed: Hope this chapter makes up for it(:**

**Manhattanpizza: Lol I totally agree.**

**Aperson3: They'll be a couple, eventually(;**

**PinkWillow Aww thanks, that means a lot to me. Yeah Jennel will probably be in the next chapter, I may or may not have forgotten about her lol.**

**Smg4ddl: Ahhh, thanks for your review. I'm happy you think it's detailed. They'll get together, somewhat soon(;**


	13. Chapter 13

**YOU GUYS I'VE NEVER BEEN SO HAPPY. WELL I HAVE BUT IT'S BEEN A WHILE LOL. I got to hear Fifth Harmony's EP and all the different versions, and omfg their voices like dios mio. And then Glee, and Dani was so cute she called Santana babe, and then she sang for like 5 seconds, and they were the best 5 FUCKING SECONDS of the cover...**

**AND THEN DEMENA! I know Selena didn't get to perform, but she posted a picture and I fucking cried and it is now my wallpaper for my phone, and I've been smiling like an idiot all day because of it and omfg. I had to share this with you guys sorry lol.**

* * *

**Selena's Pov**

The drive to the airport was a lot quieter than I thought it would be. I tried making conversation, but it was like talking to a wall. I know she doesn't wanna go, but she wasn't like this before. I noticed her mood changed once she told me her bodyguard had her stuff, I'm guessing it's the text that she got.

I still haven't brought it up, and I'm not sure if it's necessary. I just hate that this is how we're spending our last couple of hours together, in silence.

"I'm sorry Sel."

"What happened?"

"Wilmer." Both of us sighed, but we ended up giggling.

"He texted me, a lot of times actually. When I unlocked my phone it automatically opened up one of his messages, I had no choice but to read it.

I feel so guilty about this, but I don't regret it. I love you more than anything, but I just wish Wilmer wasn't in the way of this, he's innocent in all of this, he doesn't deserve for me to cheat on him.

It's late and your flight leaves soon. Um I don't know if I did anything wrong because we haven't really spoken all day. I figured you'd call or something, or that you'd be back home to pick up your stuff, but since you're not I asked Max to stop by so he has everything. I love you Demi, have a good flight, stay safe, and call when you can." She read out the message and I was left speechless.

I've never really had anything against Wilmer, I didn't like him because he was with Demi. I'm jealous and I want her all to myself, but he seems like a pretty good guy, but I feel like there's more to him.

I don't really know what to say right now. I don't want this to affect her, I know that Demi likes to please people, and when she can't she starts falling apart. Yeah things have changed, but I know she could slip up.

I wait till I pull up to the parking lot to speak up. Once I park the car I turn off the radio and turn the heater up, I don't want her to be cold.

"Demi I don't want you to beat yourself up for this."

"But how can I not? I'm sorry if this sounds bitchy but Wilmer was there when you weren't, he was my rock for months when you weren't. I can't hurt him like this, I don't wanna hurt him."

"Alright."

"Selena I didn't mean anything by that."

"Whatever, I'm not mad. You're frustrated I get it, but so am I. I don't want you to beat yourself up for this Demi, none of this is your fault.

We got into something without looking at the consequences. Our relationship is always complicated, but like you said we always come back to each other in the end. Whatever happens we'll end up together Demi.

I shouldn't have suggested we do this, I know you're in a relationship with Wilmer it was wrong of me to do even ask you."

I'm not even mad, or sad, I'm kinda just trying to hang in there. I admit was she said about me not being there for her stung a bit, but I wasn't gonna show it.

"Selena this isn't your fault, I just I shouldn't have said anything to you. I'm the one in a relationship not you, I shouldn't have said I love you when I'm with Wilmer. I'm not saying I regret it, because I do love you, but I should have waited to be single, or I should have done it a long time ago."

"A long time ago? How long ago are you talking about?"

"Princess Protection Program long ago."

I sat there with my mouth open, I couldn't believe it. I know Demi's attraction towards me isn't something recent, but I didn't exactly know how long ago it started.

"Well not even that long, that's kinda when I realized it, but I know I liked you since before then."

"Story time?" I asked her, it made me feel like a child.

"Not now, well at least not all of it.

I kinda finished putting the pieces together that day we fell asleep on the beach. Everything about that day felt like a date to me. It wasn't just because of the picnic basket or the fact that it was just on the beach, it's just the way that we acted together, it made me feel, it made me feel something I hadn't felt before.

I knew it wasn't just because you're my best friend, because I had Joe and Marissa as well, and they didn't make me feel the way that you do. Even though I liked Joe, he has absoultely nothing on you.

Everything about that day was perfect to me, just like you."

"Why did you wait so long?"

"Why are you asking me that? I could ask you the exact same thing."

"I was scared. I don't even know anymore Demi. I knew I loved you, and I knew we couldn't be together. I knew that I couldn't tell anyone about it because it was wrong for me to love a girl.

I ended up distancing myself from you because I thought it would be better, but once we started talking again I realized that I actually loved you, and I accepted it.

But there were times were I would deny it, even last year I would still deny how I feel for you. I just thought that you'd never see me how I saw you.

I was gonna tell you, you don't know how bad I wanted to tell you, and when I decided to Chloe came in and fucked everything up. After that I just stopped trying and thought it would be best to move on, but I couldn't.

That's the reason I left you, because I loved you too much and I was scared." I had barely finished talking and her lips were already on mine.

"Baby there's nothing to be scared of anymore. I'm here for you Sel, and I'm yours."

I felt myself tearing up at her words, I had to blink the tears away because my vision was blurry. I looked at the radio and read the time 9:56, she leaves in four minutes.

"But I'm not yours."

"Don't say that. You're mine, you've always been mine, and you'll always been mine. I'm sorry I was so stupid and immature about everything, but we're gonna be together when I come back. Please don't cry beautiful." I close my eyes and take in a deep breath, I have to stay strong for her.

"But I don't want you to go. I need you with me." I sobbed into her chest, I couldn't take it anymore.

My cries filled the car as my tears soaked through her shirt. I'm a total mess right now. I don't want her to leave, I want her to stay, I can't have her leave when we finally know where we stand. I know she'll be gone for a couple of weeks, but I need her with me.

"Selena, I-."

"I'm s-so sorry Demi. I'm so sorry. This i-it wasn't supposed to happen. I'm s-sorry Demi, but you need to go." I lift my head off her chest and try to dry my tears, but the moment my eyes meet her I start crying even harder than I was before.

"I don't wanna go if it's gonna hurt you."

"Demi go. I want you to, you need to go. You can't disappoint your fans for me, okay? I'll be fine."

"Selena."

"You're gonna be late. Just go, please." She unbuckles her seatbelt and smiles at me.

"You're being a lot stronger than you're giving yourself credit for. I love you Selena."

"I love you too Demi." I lean over the arm rest and kiss her.

I'm still crying, but I don't pull away, I can't pull away, I don't wanna pull away I need this to last for as long as it can. I need to feel her lips move against mine because soon I won't have that anymore.

* * *

I'm taking my time to get back home. I made sure to take a different route back home because I need to clear my head.

Watching Demi leave was so painful. It's not the first time she's had to go on tour, but usually I do a much better job at controlling my emotions. But tonight l completely lost it, I couldn't hold it in anymore.

I know she'll be back in a couple of weeks, but this time it's different. Before she would just leave, and I'd cry when I got home, but now she's leaving and our feelings for each other are clear. After years we finally know where we stand, it just hurts to watch her leave so soon.

I haven't stopped crying since I left the airport, and being in her car doesn't make it any better. I'm surrounded by everything that's her.

There's a journal, some books, and empty coffee cups from Starbucks. Typical Demi, but I wish I had something of hers I could wear. Her scent is every where, but I can't live in her car.

I'll get through this though, I really have no choice. Just because Demi left doesn't mean I have to be so lost.

But how can I not be lost when the love of my life is on her way to the other side of the world? And here come the sobs again. I miss her so much it actually hurts.

I pull over because I know I won't make it home if I keep crying like this. It's already late and I know I have a busy day tomorrow, but that's the least of my worries right now.

I take a deep breath and rub my eyes. I let my forehead hit the steering wheel and ignore the throbbing pain. My phone goes off right when the engine shuts off and that makes me groan. I don't wanna talk to anyone that isn't Demi.

I grab my phone either way, It could be something important and I'd hate if I didn't answer it.

'Hey, I know both of us have been really busy lately, but I think we're due for a Skype date, dont you?'

I wasn't expecting to get a message from her anytime soon, but I'm glad that I did. I really just need some company, even if it is through the screen of my computer.

'Of course. I'll get on in like 10 minutes, I'm on my way back home.'

* * *

"I've missed you so much."

"M-me too." She responds, but it seems like she's distracted.

I don't know what else to say so I kinda just don't say anything. She staring straight me and I don't know if she's thinking about me or if something caught her attention. She sighs but doesn't say anything.

"So how are things going?"

Things are horrible, I'm a total mess right now, but I'm not gonna dump all of that on her.

"Things are going pretty great. What about you? I know Justin wanted some people to talk to you, how did that work out?" Her eyes lit up and she smiled at me, I'm glad she's happy.

"Things went perfect. He wanted to hear some demos, and once he did he told me he wanted to sign me. So I'm leaving tomorrow night. Well technically later on today, but you get my point."

"Wait leaving to where? To here?"

"No to Alaska. Of course to there." I roll my eyes at her sarcasm and she laughs at me.

"Jennel that's amazing! I'm so proud of you, you've come a pretty long way."

"All thanks to you. If you wouldn't have said anything to Justin than this wouldn't be happening."

I hate how Justin is involved. Like I've had enough of him, and it frustrates me that he's still the center of attention.

I just smile at her, but she responds with a frown.

"Is everything okay?"

"I don't know Sel you tell me? I know your smiling just because you think it's necessary, something's bugging you.

I didn't bring it up at first because I didn't want to upset you even more, but I don't wanna see you like this. I can tell you've been crying. So what's up?"

I open my mouth to speak but nothing comes out. It's not that I don't want to tell her, it's just that I don't feel like crying anymore, and I know if I tell her I won't stop.

Would it be right to tell her? After all Demi's her ex and I wouldn't wanna rub this in her face, honestly that's the last thing I wanna do.

I'm not sure where her feelings for Demi stand, it's been a while since we last talked, and at that point she was slowly moving on. I don't know, she asked, so might as well, right?

"Demi left today. I just c-came back from dropping her off at the airport." My voice cracked and I could feel a lump beginning to form in my throat.

When did I become so fucking sensitive? Like it's just so pathetic, I was never one to break so easily. I guess that's what love does to you.

"Are you guys like together now?" I could hear the excitement in her voice, and the expression on her face only confirmed it.

"No. At least not yet." I found myself smiling at what I had just said.

"Aww Sel you're blushing." She teased and threw her head back in laughter. There's no way I'm blushing.

"Ugh, Jennel I'm not in the mood for this shit. Don't fuck with me like that." I touched my cheeks and felt how warm they felt.

I laughed and watched as she shook her head at me. That only made me laugh more.

"Um no, I'm pretty sure that's Demi's job not mine." She winked at me and started laughing, but I just sat there confused.

It's not that I'm confused, it's just that I'm shocked. I can't believe she actually said something like that, she isn't helping because that only made me blush even more. But she helped me be less sad.

"What is it with you and Demi and the sex jokes? Like damn you guys are fucking pervs." We both laughed at my statement, but I ended up yawning and made a weird noise.

"You should get to bed."

"I already am in bed, but there's no use in me going to sleep. I know I won't be able to, Demi's not here and I don't know when I'll be able to talk to her." I sighed and watched as a smirk appeared on Jennel's face.

"You love her, don't you?"

* * *

**LovezObsessed: Lol they sure are, and fuck yeah Demi needs to get rid of Wilmer.**

**VeehxD: Lol yes she does, but I haven't figured out when she's gonna break up with him.**

**Manhattanpizza: Lol sorry about the food, I have a craving for junk food like omg.**

**Demenaforever13: Haha, he'll be gone... maybe**

**Suefanficlover: Lol, Demi won't avoid dumping Wilmer, but there will be drama.**

**Smg4ddl: I almost cried of frustration, like I was looking forward to it all day yesterday, but hey we got a picture(: **

**Guest: Lol, please don't die on me xD**

**Thanks for the review you guys(:**


End file.
